i've been going back and forth about deleting this, simply because i don't have the time or energy while i'm in school and this isn't the best educational/helpful tool in any case. but we will see. i don't plan to use it anymore (and should have said so in my recent video..) but i may leave it up so folks can peruse my previous questions/answers if they so desire. apologies..

not really, and yes :]

i dont think anyone decides they are trans. but yes, i think it is possible to know something's up and wish to explore that at a young age. going to therapy really helps :]

over a year for most parts

just make sure that its something you really want to take - you can stop it, but many changes are irreversible. check out "hudson's ftm guide" by googling it and they have lots of information about testosterone. with health insurance, mine costs me 30$ for the t and syringes for about 7-8 months, without insurance it would be roughly 120$ which is still pretty affordable :]

62 :]

yes and i still eat a ton more than i used to haha. t definitely increased my appetite and its stayed that way ;]

boston, albany, burlington, san francisco are the major cities i spend my time around!

definitely! gender expression and gender identity are two separate spectrums - wishing to be androgynous in gender expression does not need to alter your own identity in any way - of course it can, but the two are not linked :] so for instance, i often suggest this to folks who say "i like to wear guys clothes and dont feel comfortable in girls things, does that mean i'm trans?" well, your identity is entirely internal, its the inherent belief of who you are - your gender expression is external, ranging from masculine to feminine to androgynous and all over the place, which is not directly linked to gender identity or sex - so masculine dress does not mean you are a man and a male, feminine dress does not mean you have to be a female or a woman.

he country that im living in, you need to be 18 to transition, and i've already come out twice to my family but they've just shoved me back in the closet both times. honestly there's no point in life if its going to be like this. cont.. i've given up on making friends because i can't anymore when any new friendship will start with a false notion since they don't even know what gender i am inside and i can't pretend to be anyone else in senior year and definitely not in college. i'm scared.. i'm so scared man. i'm so close to giving up :'("

hey my friend. have you been in therapy? with a diagnosis of depression and avoidant personality disorder, i would figure you most likely would have been, but i won't assume. if not, perhaps asking your parents to go to therapy, so this way you have a place to talk about your gender as well. if turning 18 means an opportunity to transition, perhaps that is something to prepare for. and maybe instead of not making friends, you could just let them know about your gender identity right off the bat, so that you dont have to worry about them perceiving you as someone else or anything like that.

if your parents are the main thing preventing you from what you feel you want or need, i would prepare for when you are free from their home and going off on your own, as well as try to work with them in the time being. be vehement about it - perhaps dont let them put you back in the closet. by telling others about your identity, other family members perhaps or your friends/future friends, you could have reassurrance in someone else recognizing you for who you are.

i hope this helps even in the slightest my friend. it's a tough place to feel stuck, but it is only temporary!

into college and start transitioning, you know? I want to start college as the person I really am, not a girl. Do you have any advice on how to get my mom to understand or somehow give me the go on transitioning? My dad doesn't know (mom says no telling)-and I simply can not afford to transition on my own. Anyhow, the changes will be obvious so my mom would find out if I lied to her about it... I'm stuck, Sky! What should I do? Thank you so much, and I wish you and your girlfriend the best!"

hey my friend. allright. so if you are planning to enter college in the fall, i just want to let you know that there is a slim chance you will be able to start hormones in that short of a time. HOWEVER. there are obvious options. 1. you could defer for a year, take some time off, work, get the ball rolling with therapy/doctors/the like if you want to enter and be stealth or 2. you could enter college using your preferred name (email admissions, email your professors, your RAs, your roommates, everyone ahead of time) and asking people to please respect that you want to go by that name, use whatever pronouns you want to be using whether thats male, female, or gender neutral, and start off fresh like that. then, continue therapy, start testosterone when every thing is in motion, and your friends/people will know your past, but guess what? they will have already loved and accepted you for all that you are. then everyone you meet in the future will know you as who you are and that is wonderful! i have had two friends transition in college so far, one of whom ive known pre-t, pre-name change, pre-trans identified and he's a close friend - he started T a year and a half ago and changed his name then, and i honestly cannot remember his birth name, i can't remember anything female about his past, and i really truly see him as the guy he is (as do others).

people reinvent themselves all the time. i wouldnt let that hold you back from your future, my friend.

as for your mom, i would take her to therapy when you feel comfortable. she likely is caught off guard and digesting it - my mom said she wouldnt support my transition at all monetarily nor let me start t until i was 18 - but after 6 months of therapy and bringing her to it, she and my dad both came around. it takes time for parents, so make sure you are open to her and that she knows she can talk to you about it whenever she is ready. and definitely consider bringing her/your dad to therapy with you at some point as well :]

i hope this helps a little bit, i apologize for not writing more but my fingers ache. i wish you the best my friend, and just remember - as long as you respect yourself and your identity, most likely those you meet will see that confidence, and respect you because of it, even if the may not first interpret you as male, when you let them know thats your identity right off the bat, they likely will not slip up and will most likely see you as who you present yourself as from that point on :]

i would if i could grow it. unfortunately, my family is not very facial hairy. :{[

i looked exactly how i do now, go figure! you can see pictures in my photographic evidence video, but really, besides my hair (and the slight belly hair i have) my physical appearance facially and body shape wise has not changed since pre-t greatly.

i think it can be a positive thing. i think that there is a trans movement outside the lgbt movement that is important as well, but also many trans folks may identify as lgbqaa etc etc and many lgbqaa people may identify differently on the gender spectrum as well. its important to see the connections, the helpfulness of solidarity and community, rather than to pick it apart. because really, what does a lesbian have in common with a gay male, besides the fact that society as a whole may not approve of their lifestyle?

depends what kind of public. my scars are still pretty much as obvious as they were 6 months post op, so the summer after surgery i was shirtless in public and have been since! people will stare or look but they have no idea and frankly, they dont really care.

i have not! is it good? whats it about? :]

wish i could have visited :]

i'm going to have one of my best friends donate his sperm (he's gay and in a long term relationship, and we look similar) and when i realized that no matter what, if i'm the person in that child's life who loves them from the day they are born (or if adopting, the day they are in my arms), then i am no less their father than i would have been biologically. biology is a small part in life, love and caring and being a parent is different than being the person who contributes those 18 or whatever genes that a sperm has. the majority of genes are from the female anyway ;]

it took me a while to accept that i wont have biological children, and it took me a while to feel comfortable in my beliefs. you may never come around to believe that, but i highly recommend opening your eyes to what being a parent is, what being a father or a dad or a mom or anything is, compared to what biological mechanisms are involved.

it felt really awesome, very freeing. it was a wonderful day :]

i do not frequently, and i asked my doctor and he said its the same risk a cisgender male in your family (so with similar genes) would have when it comes to drugs/alcohol/disease, at least, that's what studies so far are saying so it may be a bit clearer in the future when they gather more information on that, but i think it makes sense.