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Do you mean, for instance, formal invitations? If it is a wedding I do appreciate the option to bring a guest though I am currently single. It is nice to be able to bring a friend, have a dance partner, and someone to talk to. Addressing my invitation “The Blonde + Guest” is totally appropriate!
A friend of mine asked for some advice the other day regarding this very subject and I wanted to share with you what I thought was a very rude assumption made by a school. A phone call was placed to my friend’s place of business requesting information on her significant other for invitational purposes. It was a business function and the inquiring party had no clue whether or not she indeed had a significant other. How should she respond?
I said it’s totally appropriate to call the location back and tell them that any correspondences and invitations can be mailed directly to her, and she will pass word along to her invited guest and then inform the school of her guest’s information. Why wouldn’t the school just send “plus guest” with this invitation?! RSVP’s are made for telling the responsible parties the names of those attending!
I have never been sensitive to the “plus guest” feature until I started attending so many functions as a single girl a couple of years ago. I think “plus guest” is completely appropriate until engagement. Just my two cents. -
Do I think every couple needs one? No. Have I had them? Yes.
It’s much better when you’re a couple if you’re at a function or doing something and a song marks a moment and then when you hear that song it becomes an inside joke…rather than sitting down and picking out “our song”. If a couple is going to have a song, I like to hear a story behind it.
I think couples should dance to their song at their wedding reception (if they choose to have one!) no matter the style of the song. Fast, slow, lyrical or not. I think that makes it more memorable than having to sit through another rendition of “At Last” by Etta James. HOW many more times can a couple of dance to this at their wedding?! -
I’m really torn on answering this question, actually. I don’t think it should matter what anyone eats, ever. Nothing pisses me off more than commentary on what I am eating! However, I am sure that many people, but especially women, agonize over this very subject.
If you’re that nervous, let him order first and follow suit with a similarly sized entrée if you’re hungry. If you’re not hungry but he will be eating, it’s probably more polite to still get an appetizer and snack on that. I’m usually less concerned about portion size/amount I am eating than the price of what I’m ordering! I don’t want to be seen as someone who intentionally ordered something expensive because I was being ‘taken out’–nor do I want to “get the lobster and have to put out”. *shrug*
I don’t think men generally care what you eat as long as it’s nothing disgusting to watch you eat. Maybe ordering the rack of ribs isn’t a great idea–not portion wise, but the manner in which you eat it can be a bit…messy. I’ve seen some men say that they prefer women to eat on a date and not be afraid to have an appetite.
To me, it’s all relative. Don’t order a steak dinner if the plan was drinks. Conversely, don’t just order drinks if he took you out to dinner. -
Classic question and one that I feel pretty strongly about, actually.
The party who extends the invitation should also open the wallet. End of story. Even if you're the "woman". If you invite someone to go somewhere and it is a date (and don't play that "just getting to know someone" game here, people!) then you are obligating yourself to pay the bill for both parties, whether it's expensive or they drink too much or I don't care what. It is the price you pay to spend time with someone.
With that being said, I think it's a polite move to offer to pay for your half should you feel inclined to do so. This can be either a kind gesture or alleviating yourself from the pressure of 'owing' someone something following a date. Never should you feel obligated to put anything 'out' if you've received compensation in the form of meals or drinks!
A funny story from my last date--following drinks at a local brewery the check came. My date quickly grabbed the bill and pulled out his card, which was a great move. However, in both a gesture of kindness and to alleviate myself from any obligations I offered to pay my half. Of course I didn't get my hands on the check first, but I reached for my purse and said "You certainly don't have to pay for my drinks! Allow me..." and before I could finish my date says "Hmm. That wasn't a very genuine offer."
........What?
Incidentally I ended up kissing him at the end of the date because I felt guilty. But that's an entirely other story for another question! -
I wear two different perfumes—Unconditional Love by Philosophy and Viva La Juicy by Juicy Couture. Viva is for when I’m feeling fun and funky, and Unconditional Love is for when I am feeling pretty and classic. I wear perfume every day. I use unscented deodorant and shaving lotion because I like to ensure that my perfume is the only scent I carry. My grandmother and mother wear another scent by Philosophy and frequently get comments on how great they smell, but I have only been complimented one time, by one person, on my perfume choice, and it still makes my day to remember it!
I think scent can be attractive. Who hasn’t brushed past someone and said “Oh my GOSH he/she smells UH-MA-ZING!”. However, I don’t think I’ve ever smelled someone and subsequently become attracted to them for the long term. It’s just a pleasant side item. Mostly, for me, scent is tied to memory. Smelling certain cologne, air freshener, or other scents can instantly take me back 5, 10, 15 years. It is both a comfort and a curse, because scent can make me instantly happy, sad, or both. It’s not limited to perfumes. Sometimes I smell buildings where I work that take me back to an exam I took in college, nearly causing anxiety attacks as I walk around!
I really like Burberry cologne on men. My first boyfriend wore Eternity and I will forever remember that scent. I can recall it in my mind and trick myself into smelling it! -
Great question. Mostly, I don’t know. Some girls notice height, hair, shoes (I’m looking at you, LM!). I think if I notice anything physical about someone, it’s probably their mouth/teeth. I am not a stickler for perfectly straight teeth. However, I like to look at teeth. I blame years of braces and dentist visits for this. I like to see someone smiling, showing their teeth. I think when you smile and show teeth you’ve let go on ‘control’ and are having a good time.
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This question takes me back to high school when ‘talking’ meant dating. Is that what you mean? Perhaps you mean the longest I’ve ever been interested in someone before it went somewhere or I gave up? Here’s a secret I’ll tell you. I have never been turned down by someone I am chasing, and I never give up. Ever.
My life is full of people I chase endlessly, I think. For some reason, I’m willing to put effort into pursuit of a crush. I intend to get what I want, so if that takes 6 months, so be it. I chase The Friend for four months before anything ever happened. And spent the next two years trying to get him firmly in my grasp even after I got what I ‘wanted’. The longest I’ve talked to someone without anything happening is nearly two and a half years. But believe me, it wasn’t for lack of trying to make something happen. Somehow, I still believe I’ll get what I want one day.
Is there a lesson to be learned here? How long should one ‘talk’ to an interest before giving up? Is there a point of no return—where you can never start over as friends but will never be a couple? You tell me. I’m still chasing.. -
This is a question for a post all it’s on, really. But I will give you a short and sweet answer that sort of skirts the question and promise to delve into this subject in depth on this blog in the near future.
I think there is a difference between meeting someone online and going on a dating site in order to meet someone. I am interested in meeting someone online in a setting of common interest and fellowship—chatting, message boards, hey this blog (just kidding, no applications please.). I think that’s an awesome and viable way to meet people, especially for me, someone who’s looking for a partner with common interests and personality. My uncle met his wife online way back in the day before people were meeting online, and they’ve been happily married for a long, long time.
I think online dating is fabulous for some people. Someone I know is in a great relationship that was started on a dating site. I’m very jealous of the success this person had! However, I don’t feel up to trying it just yet. The short answer for why is that I am fairly creeped out by the pictures I’ve seen on dating sites. I will never ever want to message you if your default picture is you with your shirt off. The long answer has something to do with the fact that I still don’t know what the heck I’m looking for, so how on earth could I find it on an online dating site? I feel like I’d be looking for a needle in a haystack but I didn’t really have a description of the needle in the first place.
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