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All responses Most smiled responses
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this formspring is officially dead
arab on radar is pretty good. -
here are two things you can do.
1. you can just forget about it. if he dumped you over the phone and didn't explain anything, then all that happened was, something factual about the world was made obvious. if he dumps you over the phone and won't explain why, then that is who he is and has proven that true and has also proven that your relationship won't work. so in a sense, you have nothing to feel bad about, because the world just worked itself out in front of you. at the same time, it's not desperate to call him back because he made a bitch-made move. for real, you can tell him that from me. in fact, give me his number. yeah, email me his number and some information about the break up and i will record it or remember it and write it down and report back to you. i'll either get him to go back to you, or i'll threaten his life and he;ll stay away from you.
2. you can call him back and act like nothing happened and then break up with him and then when he acts confused just ignore it and keep saying, "i just feel this is better" and other shit like that and it'll be really funny and--i think ultimately--very traumatizing to him.
3. here's a bonus option: me and you get together. we put on all black clothing. we go to his house at night. we sneak in. you start dousing the place with gasoline. while you're doing that, i go up into his room where he's sleeping. i break his legs with a baseball bat. you light the house on fire. then me and you stand by the front door and wait, arm in arm, for his crippled and scorched body to crawl through the front door, begging for you to take him back. then we both put our hands up to our ears and say, "what's that, i can't hear you through your melted-ass lips, you little bitch." then we both laugh and walk away together, maybe get some ice cream at baskin robbins. on me. -
i'm listening to the song "state is bad" by u.s. maple over and over. i think if i can write a book that is like a u.s. maple song then i will quit. i don't ever think i'm good. in fact, i think the only reason i keep trying to write things is because i always look back on things i've written and think they are not quite good and can be made better. so my only motivation is really feeling bad about how much i suck and then i try to do better. that's how it is with most everything in my life. i think about how i failed and can do better. and then i always do better but still end up feeling like i failed because it can then be done better again. it's the result of my dad being an asshole i think. i'm just never happy with anything. i just had an urge to lie down on my back and piss on myself. not joking.
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i'm not sure. maybe people who don't have good lives, aren't popular, don't look classically attractive, have hard times with other people, hate themselves, don't know what they want to do in life, think about death/suicide all the time, obsess about how shitty they are all the time, don't have friends, don't have a good job, hate their parents, wish things were different but really don't wish that at all, think most things are pointless, have violent fantasies, over/under sexed, wish they could get away with burning down a house, dream terrible dreams, don't know anything practical, doubt themselves, mutilate themselves, barely ever go out or hang out, spend a lot of time alone, skeptical/cynical, don't ever believe anything they haven't experienced themselves, don't believe any popular opinion, reject anything mass produced/sold to them in an unnatural way, honestly feel like aliens, only smile when they're alone, like snow, do drugs but maybe don't want to, have no idols, live inside their head etc.
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i honestly can't imagine living past 35. like, even 35 seems as though i'm still somewhat delusional and don't even realize how close i am to losing my mind and killing myself. this isn't a cry for help. i feel ok actually. it's just, everything feels so stupid to me now. even shit i recently thought was interesting. more and more i think i just want to be left alone. i think i'll probably delete this account soon. a lot of this internet stuff doesn't appeal to me anymore. i think i just want to keep making shit like books and drawings and music, and then when that gets old, i'll know it's time to die. i just want to relax. but i can't. there is never relaxation or comfort it seems. i don't want to be popular or anything like that. i just want to make things, and, generally, be left alone. i feel alienated from my generation and the things that happen around me. none of it makes sense to me anymore. i don't understand what motivates almost everyone i encounter. sometimes i have this urge to just nod to someone i see on the street, like a nod that means, "hey, come here." and then be like, "hey can you please tell me why you haven't killed yourself yet, honestly. what do you have that makes your life worthwhile." i've made lifestyle changes. i stopped doing drugs, i stopped eating a lot of red meat, i stopped drinking a lot of caffeine, i cut down on sugar, i can run many miles and lift weights and i feel better and my mind feels good kind of, like a different kind of better (not good) and my dick looks fatter now and i can fuck many many times a day like i could when i was younger and i'm not really upset about anything in particular, or threatened by others, or even insecure about what i can do, there is just some leftover feeling of misery. it's accumulating fast and it comes to me fast too, like these terrible mood swings. and the worst part is, there is no release. i never cry, no one ever picks fights with me, i can never fuck enough, and nothing else makes it go away. the other day a little old chinese lady asked me to check the price of everything in her shopping cart for her and i felt like i was going to kill her. and then i was like, "what is my problem." but the worst part is, it doesn't even feel like a problem anymore. i just let the bad feelings happen and then i don't care about reasoning them out or changing them. it's like i've fallen in love with my shithead self. people at work say things like "why don't you smile" or "why are you so serious all the time." but i'm not even serious, my face is just something that hangs there, stupid as everything else. i feel like my bad mood drains others. other people can tell when my mood is bad. they're like, "are you ok" or everyone just stops talking around me. i can't control it. it's so bad to be a person. like, think about it. you are one thing, in charge of one thing that can't possibly be important compared to the collection of other "one-things." like, to yourself, you are supposed to be in control, and important. but that's like opening a bunch of the same toy, throwing them into a pile, picking one out and saying, "this one is best and i will try to help it out over the other toys." miserable toys. and also, what are my options. should i try to spend time with other people, "get out more." whenever i do that, i end up bringing my violent bad moods into other peoples' lives and they resent me. plus barely anyone is interesting. so what should i do then. stay away from it all, and increase the acuteness of the misery. there is no solution. and there isn't even anyone i want to spend time with. i feel like everything has been done. all that's left is repeating it at certain intervals to maintain what feels like a life. a fucking life. you're born with a life so how can it ever feel like life is something that never happened. this isn't a phase. this isn't something you get over. it's something you try to pass over to forget about. but it's there. take away your friends, your school, your family, your drugs, your internet life and all that's left is a scared nobody who has no idea what it's like to be him/herself. i want badly to feel comfort for a little bit. i want to relax. i just want to fuck all the time and be left alone so i can make a book or drawing or some music before i lose my shit in a violent instance at work where like, i see a bright light or something or hear a voice and then just never ever come back to reality again. i can't fucking wait, promise.
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asked by BornToChill
i pretty much feel like any job is bad because of the element of being required to be somewhere/do something at a certain time. like, even if my job was breaking windows, i'd still be like, mad that i had to be somewhere at a certain time doing a certain thing. that said, i think we can both agree that "elephant penis-scab licker" is the worst job, aside from "self-inflicted eyeball shaver with a disposable two-blade razor person." close runners-up would be "white girl dater" and "grocery store manager"
as for cheese, whichever kind i can eat from out between your mother's clenched ass cheeks. -
really confused about how you missed with the toilet paper but, that's not what's important. i think it's ok to get the change out with your hand, regardless of what's inside the toilet. for real, i do nasty shit with my hands and i like, never wash them and nothing bad happens. i honestly feel like washing your hands is a myth. the only bad thing that ever happened to me from not washing my hands, was i was cutting up a jalapeno one time and then i went to piss and i touched my dick and it burned so bad. it made me feel insane. it wouldn't stop burning. i had to submerge my dick and balls in a glass of milk to soothe the burning. so if you're cutting up jalapenos then yeah, i mean, wash your hands. but putting your hands in the toilet is ok. if you're still not able to do it, just like, leave the bathroom, go up to someone and be like, "hey i was wondering what a social security card looks like, can i see it." then when they show you it, run into the bathroom and throw it in the toilet. then when the person goes to get it out, be like, "hey can you get my change out while you're in there." but either way, remember: washing your hands is a myth.
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asked by madisonlangston
i have this thing lately where i'll be out walking around and i'll imagine myself opening fire on a car with an assault rifle. then the person in the car gets out and opens fire on me with an assault rifle. no one dies though. and people keep getting out of cars and coming out of buildings with assault rifles, bullets everywhere but no one gets hurt or dies. it's just this loud gunfight where no one gets hurt. everyone wants everyone else to get hurt, but no one does. and then there's a moment where the gunfire slowly decreases and eventually is just like, one or two people firing a few last shots, and we all put down the guns and continue whatever we were doing.
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now now, i dont want any trouble. just be cool.
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i'm starting to think ch'y'all motherfuckers don't care about the rules of this formspring, i really am. and it hurts.
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ok i just looked up bariatric surgery because i had never heard of it. now i know what it is. and now that i know what it is, i can tell you, probably nothing will change. so at least you know that. at least you can say "still going to be hopeless and very tired no matter what." because that's true. i feel hopeless and tired all the time. also, nothing will make you happy. happiness is a terrible lie. happiness presumes that there is something you are missing, and once you have it, everything will be fine. but if there was happiness, it would immediately dissolve. how many times have you ever gotten something that made you permanently happy. none. none times, money. and that's because happiness is a series of miserable distances between yourself and what you think you want. but once you lessen those distances, you will find there is another right after, then another. you will never fell total fulfillment. are you young? people will tell you it's just a phase. people always say "hating yourself" or "feeling worthless" and other negative things are just phases or things to get over. but they're not. if you get over them, you've just become a pathetic, numb adult. those types of feelings have only increased in size and truth in my life . and they probably will in yours. as for the other parts of you question, i don't know why we keep going even when we know better. i think it's because maybe we don't know better. i've thought about this. like, why haven't i killed myself yet. and i think it's because the feeling of happiness i mentioned earlier, is still something that draws me to keep going. i keep thinking, maybe there is something. there is a weird hope in being able to finally get something i really want. but still, i dont know. my life usually only gets worse in ways that amaze me. also, we are also biologically inclined to protect ourselves. it's instinct to not want to die, or to prevent it from happening. but i think i am most close to anything like "happiness" when i'm doing nothing at all to protect myself, instead wishing for harm to myself in every way. so my advice to you is, don't ever expect to be happy. if anything, just live through your life as revenge on yourself for being too stupid to kill yourself.
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first off, this isn't an advice question. second off, i don't even get it. you put the mushrooms in your face and eat them and then you feel fucked up for a while. i don't get it. seriously just [makes fists and does half groaning/half sputtering sound with mouth] just [breathes out] ask for advice.
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i don't know. i've always been cool. it's like asking a grape how it became a grape. just a normal connection of events, rooted in history and the beginning of time. all things converging and producing new things that converge and produce new things. at some point, the world's convergences produced me. and i was and always will be cool. probably because i barely ever had any emotions. i just look around and think "this is it?" and i don't feel much. which makes me seem cool, but i'm not. i'm just a miserable asshole. if being like me is what being cool is like, then you dont want it. it's terrible. it's like being garbage. yeah, actually, my advice is to be like garbage if you want to become cool. start out as something that is a new version of something. a useful, beautiful and pleasing version of something. something that was produced by a chance series of events, something unique and full of promise. then neglect yourself. leave yourself out somewhere on the ground and don't move. become less and less of that something you once were. still be recognizable, but only recognizable through how you've changed for the worse. be a piece of garbage in the alley--something people don't even feel the need to get rid off, or concern themselves with in any way. just be there, blowing whichever way the wind blows your garbage ass. then you'll be cool and it won't even matter anymore because becoming cool means you really and truly don't care about anything anymore, and it's not nearly as great as it was when you said it but still cared enough to say it and make people believe you thought it. :)
also, merry christmas everyone. -
i'm seriously losing my interest in being alive. this isn't a joke. i need help.
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what is going on.
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i'm pretty sure jordan castro doesn't have feelings like "love." im pretty sure he just sits in his dorm room holding his penis and daintily sipping drug infused cough syrup, like a fucking mobsta. but, if i had to guess a scenario where that kind of thing could happen between you two. i'd say have someone put a hook through the back of your head and raise you up a flagpole, where, once raised, you slit your abdomen open up the middle and let your fucking guts fall out. he's bound to notice then. he might like perfume too. sometimes i like perfume. or no, body odor. i like when a girl smells like hardcore body odor. try that. try asking him to smoke a blunt with you then hit on him. pin him down and fuck him. or i don't know, just stop trying, nothing is worth it . it's all stupid pointless shit to keep you from remembering that any lifetime is way too long and there's nothing to accomplish. the world doesnt care . i promise . i mean, i dont. you could email me and be like "jordan loves me forever now, because of your advice" and the look on my face wouldn't change, i'd just sit there (like a mobsta) and not care.
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SAMMMMPINK’s Bio
this is an advice column. ask for advice about anything and i'll help you.
