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Rebel Cupcake.
But for real, probably carrot cupcakes, german chocolate cupcakes (choc + coconut = heaven), and red velvet. I'm still waiting for bleeding armadillo cupcakes to come into my life. -
This wouldn't necessarily be a first date, but if the chemistry is right with someone I love marathon days that involve brunch (which is my favorite meal), shopping someplace cool like the Brooklyn Flea Market, hanging out in a park with coffees and my dog, a disco nap, dinner somewhere I've never been, a fun queer dance party that spills out onto the street and a daybreak walk.
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I like punk, preppy, dapper, rockabilly, cowboy or some combination of the foregoing on butches. I love ties, cufflinks, good shoes or boots, nice wallets (it's a good reveal), button up shirts, cool/funny t-shirts. And cowboy hats that fit well and match an aesthetic.
I especially love the color pink on butches because I enjoy masculinity and I enjoy pink and it's two great tastes that taste great together or whatever. In my opinion, it takes someone very secure in their dapperness and masculinity to wear the color pink.
I feel blessed that many of my butch friends are extremely well dressed and I get to enjoy that. Usually vocally--I am known to exclaim loudly whens someone comes into view wearing something awesome, butch, femme or otherwise. -
I cannot see @ tweets directed at me if your tweets are protected. That is a shortcoming of the twitter platform. Generally I follow people who I know in real life, long time internet pals, a few cherished celebrities and other interesting flotsam. I suppose all one needs to do to get me to follow is to ask AND follow that up by being interesting.
Between you and me, anonymous formspring question asker, I am sort of an inconsistent twitter reader. I follow 200 folks and some stuff gets lost. And when I read on my phone (which I often do) I can't "@" back at people so my participation is often sporadic. -
They day that I celebrated my personhood as opposed to couplehood. I was supposed to be getting married, but six months before the wedding my fiance dumped me. So since that date was already on save the date magnets on the fridges of my loved ones, I had a big party in Brooklyn in my friends' amazing backyard.
My BFF Rachael came to town from Atlanta (it was also her birthday) and I had about 2/3s of the friends that I love around me. We had a huge spread of amazing bbq wings and food and everyone who asked me what kind of booze to bring was told champagne.
It was one of the best days of my whole life. I was completely single and completely in love with my life. I have a photo from that day on my inspiration collage for 20Femme. It is my goal to try to live to that level of joy as much as possible. -
First, I acknowledge the feelings. It's really important to be self-aware and recognize that you're not always going to feel amazing and glorious--it is unrealistic. And while, logically, I can step back and say "woo, breadth of human experience or whatever", it still sucks.
So, acknowledging that I feel disempowered and down in the dumps is helpful because then I can do a little digging about what I need. The other day I felt really tragic and I realized I needed a specific kind of attention and intimacy, two things I was lacking. I managed to solve this with a nice, long video chat with my BFF in Atlanta who was also at home on a Saturday night.
Other things I do to feel better: long baths, journal writing, remembering the power of 6 months (EVERYTHING is different in 6 months), listening to music that is upbeat but sad (no one can make heartbreak sound happy like Dolly Parton), or music that is just plain sad. Most of all, though, I call friends. I am a problem talker and I get good perspective from them.
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Bevin’s Bio
I am the Queer Oprah, working to make the world safe for people to love themselves regardless of their marginalizations.
