I tend not to put time limits on things, I just decide I want to do something then set to doing it, and let it happen in the timeframe that it's meant to happen. I find things tend to work themselves out in the time they need.

I do want a holiday though!

by the end of this year? humm.. there's not a whole lot left in the year! i hope to get on meds for my health issues and be able to go to the gym without getting sick :P i know meds seem like a small goal, but it would make a pretty huge difference in my life right now and it's hard to make any other goals while sick.

Not really, but I've had a lot of them contact me. Mostly ones that wouldn't have given the time of day to me back then, but suddenly they want to be BFF's now.

I think those kind of people peaked a little too early in life, and are looking to relive it.

dreams don't always mean anything.. a lot of it's just random but it really is something in your subconscious then it depends on the context. Fire could represent passion, heat (maybe you need to turn the AC down? lol), a destructive force, or it could even represent a lack of control or feelings of danger.

facebook means I've talked to a lot of people I knew from high school. being a vegan, atheist, feminist, fat activist it doesn't tend to turn out well. All of those things are things that people usually hate. From what I've seen (in my experience and what i've seen with others) the only way to really stay friends with people over long long periods of time is if you change in the same ways (usually if you're around each other to influence each other) or if you have no passions or interests or ethical opinions about pretty much anything. But who knows.. it's certainly possible to reconnect with someone and get along.. i've just never personally seen it work out.

I'm sure every fat activist would have a similar answer but I would say: There is nothing wrong with you. Everyone's allowed to be different and if we all stand up for ourselves, sizist bigotry doesn't have a chance! There is nothing that you can't do now.. right now. Don't wait until you lose X lbs- it's a waste of the life that you should be living up to the fullest. You have nothing to lose by being happy or loving yourself.

I never thought about a spirit animal until I watched Star Trek Voyager...now that's the first thing that comes to mind when someone says 'spirit animal.' I don't really think I have one.

When I was younger I was obsessed with the aye-aye...until I got obsessed with the platypus. I was a weird kid...and let's just say I had these National Geographic animal cards that came with a green case.

The first thing that comes to mind is a cuttlefish--it's like the psychedelic chameleon shapeshifter of the sea--but then I roll my eyes at myself and think of that time I said my favorite color was silver because it reflected all the colors of the rainbow. I meant it then, but it's such a hippie-dippy thing to say.

Then again, given that story, maybe cuttlefish is the obvious...though horribly self-indulgent choice.

This is hard for me. I like a good massage. But I have thought a lot about this and have come up with nothing. It'd be nice to sleep all day. I wonder what this says about my self care.

Actually, I was thinking lately that I need a day away from everyone and everything, even my partner....even away from--dare I say it--the internet. A day with no interaction.

not in the least. I used to hate having my photo taken and I was one of those annoying women who would always put her hand up if you tried to take a photo (yes, one of *those* people!). I hated looking at myself and could only see a fat, hideous, beast.. or maybe, on a good day, i'd think "hum.. well, i guess I could be pretty if I just lost weight" (commence starvation). I would literally have panic attacks over something as awful as video.

I'm not sure if I'm good at giving advice on this topic.. I got most of my advice from delving into the fat acceptance movement- Lessons From the Fat-O-Sphere is what really brought me out of my shell and convinced me that loving myself was way more productive than hating myself. One thing that I did was I had photos taken of things that I particularly hated- doing a nude shoot was a huge huge step for me in accepting my body. I also love to browse sites like adipositivity.com and look at how beautiful other fat women are and realize that I'm not somehow less worthy than they are. I also just read up on the science.. i'm all about some science! Once I learned (with actual evidence and studies!) that fat wasn't some defect and it wasn't somehow my fault for being too lazy or gluttonous.. then it was easy to take that information and use it to brush off anyone who sought to abuse me for my weight. Logic and science prevail! So I guess my best advice is to arm yourself with knowledge- make sure you have a good way to defend yourself against the constant abuse and sizism and use that to boost yourself up and know, really know, that there is not a damn thing wrong with you.