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Yeah, it's pretty common. It's common amongst trans guys in general, actually, queer trans guys just get the double whammy of wanting to be certain guys and wanting to date/fuck them. Some guys want to be the same types of guys they want to date/fuck, other guys want to be one type and date/fuck another. I fall into more of the first category, it's confusing as hell sometimes.
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Um. That depends on what you'd consider transphobia, I suppose. I've certainly gotten more than my fair share of crap for being gay and effeminate. Oh, and all the shit I get for not being interested in any of the current lower surgery options. I consider those transphobic, but not everyone does.
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Yeah, I think it's hard to be online without knowing about Dirt. Honestly, I think it's rude and plain fucked up, but she *does* technically have a right to say what she likes. I have always been a firm believer that if I want to voice my opinion I have to allow those I disagree with to voice theirs. My only real objection is to her posting photos of trans guys she's found online without their permission. It's also the only thing she could theoretically be prosecuted for so...
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Topping, yes. Bottoming, only with partners I trust and even then not all that often.
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Put my strap-on dick into a vagina. Think like gay topping vs bottoming only with a vagina. I do neither (they kind of freak me out).
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Crap, I'm sorry, I didn't get the email notification for this.
Short answer: you are not at all unusual or abnormal. Many trans guys don't feel dysphoric, even to the point of skipping hormones and surgery. Everyone's different, it just depends on your relationship with your body. -
I don't really know of any communities, but I've found that it's fairly common for stealth guys to go under an assumed name in the more general trans areas. As for Buck Angel...yeah, I hate that crap. Not all of us are comfortable with our bodies the way they are, that's kind of the whole point of dysphoria. I could tell him the same thing seeing as how he's had top and taken T.
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Nope, sorry. I like my privacy and once photos are out there there's no way to get them back. Just ask any guy who's been featured on Dirt's blog.
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I have and no I don't because [a] I'm not interested in being out and [b] Kael has fled the US due to several charges of rape and sexual assault that the trans community continues to insist on trying to cover up. He is a jackass that I would never trust near my naked body.
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Random. Eccentric. Spazzy. More reserved than people expect until I feel comfortable enough to loosen the intensely tight reins I keep myself on.
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I honestly have no idea. I blocked mine completely from my mind so that when it happened I was always a bit surprised.
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Yup, always. I'm one of those rare monosexuals, most people fall somewhere in the middle. Trans guys (especially straight ones) often experience some level of shift in their attractions, it's perfectly normal. A bit unsettling, but normal.
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I can't tell you whether or not you're a boy, that's something you have to figure out for yourself.
As for whether or not being trans can be a phase...I think it depends. I think feeling like your body is wrong or missing something is deeper than any phase can be. I think that wanting to inject yourself weekly and have major surgery to remove or add parts goes well beyond a phase. That's not the sort of thing most people do without serious thought.
Now, things like gender expression are harder to pin down. I refused to wear pink for several years during my childhood. Did that mean I was any less of a girl or campy little boy? No, but it does mean I went through a (somewhat) butch phase. I think that for many people it can be difficult to separate gender identity from gender expression so that butch women sometimes feel like they should transition and effeminate trans men feel like they shouldn't. Those questioning feelings can be considered a phase, or they can be considered just what they are: questioning.
There are also people who have fluid gender identities. I have a few friends whose gender identity can sometimes change several times throughout the day. More often they'll consider themselves a man for a few months then a woman for a while after that then maybe wake up and be agender for a week. It's a little different from the norm, but it works for them. -
Um, that's not something I paid attention to so I had to go back through pictures for this one and...my lips seem to have gotten fuller, actually. They're, like, pouty now.
Texture wise they're the same as they've always been. I'm an obsessive consumer of chapstick and I drink *tons* of water so my lips have never been hard or rough. They're always all nice and smooth and soft. -
I have, but not everyone does. The trans men and women I've worked with have had about a 50/50 split on whether or not their hair changes texture. It's worth noting that there actually isn't a particular way guy hair feels that's automatically different from women's hair. I can guess any number of other things from a person's hair, but gender isn't one of them.
In terms of looks, trans men's hairlines tend to change dramatically. Mine has receded and revealed a widow's peak that's apparently been in hiding my entire life. I finally have enough of a male-shaped line to pull off various military haircuts if I really want to. It's still changing so I'm hoping I don't end up going bald. -
Glad to have helped! If you're not already on Tumblr I'd suggest signing up for an account. Quite a few trans and gay teens on there. It's like queer central.
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Now how would I manage to maintain my super secret identity if I posted pictures all over the internet?
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Talk. Get it out there so that you both know what's going on. Chances are he's a bit terrified too.
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Strap-on, definitely. I don't mind the others, but they're just not the same.
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This is always tricky. Allies are kind of fucked when it comes to being asked about their sexual orientation. On the one hand, if they say they're straight people tend to think they have internalised homophobia issues. On the other, if they *don't* say anything they either get mis-read or people think they're trying to be coy or edgy.
I think it really depends on how the person says it. Something as simple as "That's not the impression I want to give people" can be taken in two entirely different ways depending on the tone.
I mean, I can't exactly blame straight people for not wanting to have their sexuality mistaken. I know my friends who pass for straight often get irritated by being mis-read because it means they have a harder time finding dates and stuff. I can only imagine it's more difficult the other way around because there's not even the added bonus of straight privilege.
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