Sleeping with a bra on wouldn't do anything for me. Except make me kinky, I guess.

I don't like to go to skool.
Sometimes, going to bed fills me with glooms and dreads (lol lyk 4 ur hair?) because I have to wake up in the morning and go to school.
And I can't ever make up a reason to be excited about that, so I can't ever not feel like poo about it.

if someone thinks that's gross idk why they got pets in the first place.
Sleeping with the pets is like, one of the best things about having pets.

When I'm laying at a half tilt, like half laying-half sitting up, on my bed, reading, or something like reading, Tito painfully struggles up my body, onto my pillow, licks me in my ear, and then turns around, and stomps all over my shoulder with his back feets, like he's trying to smash me into a comfortable position, like i am made of nesting materials. His butt is ofc in my face while this happens. He settles down, and then goes to sleep on my pillow/neck with his butt in my face. And that's all fucking adorable to me. At no point, do I think , "man, this is gross." I just think, "AW, PUPPY! :DDDDDDD NOBODY ELSE LOVES ME ENOUGH TO PUT THEIR BUT IN MY FACE, JUST THIS PUPPY."

if everyone had someone that loved them enough to lick them in the ear, and sleep across their necks, and put their butts in their faces, and chew up all their socks, and yap at them for an hour straight when they come home from school, because god knows why, then we'd all be happy. the world needs more Titos.

I wouldn't do either of those. If I stayed up 'til only 10PM, I'd wake up at 3AM. Or 2AM. If I stay up until 3AM and I don't have to get up for school in the morning, I'd probably sleep 'til 8 or 9AM.

It's really hard, and requires special circumstances, for me to sleep too much past sunrise. Sun gets in my eyes, and I'm up. I have to be sick not to wake up early-ish in the morning. Even then, I still get up in the morning, I just go back to sleep shortly after.

I'm just saying. I guess.

This is one of those things I've typed, and just not sure why.

Dislike, no.
But insulting something is different from disliking it. Even though I feel this way sometimes, I'm aware that someone disliking something, is not an insult to the thing.
Constructive criticism, is one thing. Explaining any music-related reasons for disliking, okay.
But some stupid unnecessary remark, or that whole "overrated" or "overplayed" or "boring" thing that everyone goes for, sucks. And I think the people who make so many of these claims, should probably just save it. I don't think that someone else liking something more than you, personally, like it, makes it overrated. And I don't think that makes it boring.

If someone is overbearing with their opinions on music, and their opinions on music are 80% negative, they seem to think this is some indication of their superior knowledge of music.
It's just an indication of their own preferences, and says nothing objectively true about the band/artist or the people who enjoy their music.

And I'm applying that to everything, including Jbiebs, Weird Al, and everything in-between.


When I talk to people about music, and they name their likes and dislikes, I always ask them why they like or dislike something. And I know that's a stupid question sometimes, because sometimes, you just like something. or sometimes, you just don't. Can I give a really detailed, valid explanation to why I don't like peanut-butter? Not really. Or, can I give a really valid, detailed explanation to why I love french fry? I mean, yes. But I probably wouldn't, because it'd take all night, ya feel me?
I've noticed people are a lot better at describing why they like something, than they are at describing why they dislike something. Which I've decided means, because love stuff more than they hate stuff. And that's nice.

My own acne is a turn off for me.
it's not even the fact that my face has herpes, it's the unevenness of the tones. bugs me. want to be just one color. any color. like green. or orange, like snooki. you know.
i'm lying though, the herpes on my face bother me even if they weren't red and horrible.
so.
but i have all my limbs
its not a real problem
but if it weren't a thing for me, i think i'd find myself less repulsive.

But I don't think I notice other people's acne. Unless they're like, dude, look at all my zits, and then i notice. and i'm like, hey i know that feel, pls luv me we r da same.
but that doesnt work.

Man, my brain is stupid. Just by saying "pls luv me we r da same" I got El Scorcho (THE WEEZER SONG) going in my head. And like. That's not even the lyrics. That's just the general theme of the lyrics.

Once, I was talking to my friend, and she said something about how annoying Weezer was to her, and I was like, "Dude, I love Weezer... no homo." There, I'd used "no homo" to follow a statement that I knew the person I was talking to disagreed with.
I guess that's not how you use no homo.
But it seems appropriate.

And from that day on, we kept saying we loved Weezer, no homo. And it wasn't funny to anyone but us.
When I think about it now, I'm not sure why it was so funny, then. But man, at any opportunity, we said it. Someone would be like, "what's your favorite band?" and Shelby would be like, "Weezer... no homo." And i'd totally lose my shit.
I guess part of why THAT was funny, was because she didn't even like Weezer.
I actually do like Weezer tho.
i feel like it's hard not to like Weezer.
since Weezer is made up of the every man.
i understand weezer
i get weezer
i feel weezer, inside of me.
yes, homo.
wat wus the question
this account has been suspended
so it's not going to inconvenience whoever sent it i guess
since they were probably the maximum of inconvenienced when their account was suspended
so i can't possibly become an annoyance in this person's internet life.
or maybe this would still annoy them somehow
i don't know.
i don't know how other people feel.

http://youtu.be/-S42EsIDXpM

Play

The last animal I saw, was a lobster.
'cause I'm looking at a picture of two lobsters, getting hitched.

If I wake up, on my wedding day, as a lobster, I guess that's fine.
Idk if the person would still love me. I mean, if they were attracted to lobsters, and i wasn't a lobster before, but then turned into a lobster, i'd probably think they had something to do with it. Like, they got a poison from Yzma, that turned me into a lobster, because they wanted to sex lobsters.
I'd leave them if that were the case. And instead of getting married, and being dull, I'd become an apathetic bodyguard, I guess.

If she'd been complaining about the size of her penis, that would have been slightly more peculiar. So I guess it all fits. Yup, everything checks out O.K here, Rick.

why would anyone bother saying they werent ok with their penis size, if you have an issue with it, it can be a secret, since you don't (or at least aren't supposed to) have ur paynus where everyone can see it all the time. so it can be a secret.
a paynus secret.
zip it and lock it, and put the key in you pocket, you know what i'm sayin?
zip it and lock it, and put the key in your penis.
no. no i'm sorry. don't do that. don't put anything in your penis.
unless you have to, for medical reasons.
or if that's the kinda thing you're into, I guess.
I mean, I dunno, it's not really my place to tell anyone what to do with their penis.
disregard all that.

There's some infomercial that comes on at 4AM on Comedy Central, about how you need to buy some stuff to make your dongus bigger, or no one will ever come near you, not even to pay for the Starbucks coffee you will probably be handing them.
There's some women, telling some supposedly true stories, about how horribly traumatizing it was to know men with small penises. And my brother, who was pretty high at the time, but I think it would have made him angry anyway, because he gets pretty mad about how it's ok to be sexist towards men, and make fun of their body parts and tell them to either kill themselves or fix it, and then I'm like, john, have you looked around, apparently it's okay to be sexist towards women too, similar shit gon' down over there in Ladyville, we really are all equal now, the world is horrible for everyone, we finally made it, my how far we've come, and all that jazz.
that's the end of the story.
actually
i was going to type out the conversation we had about the infomercial, which was really dumb, but i just realized, no one cares. .

Was gonna say something else on penises...
Uhhhhhhhhh.
Oh, no, it was actually going to be about how it's fun to say vagina like it has an R in it.
Vergina.
Go ahead, try it. Right now. Say it, aloud, "VeRgina"
You'll not be able to stop, I guarantee.

A lot of the time, I'll answer a question, and it'll only sorta, except not really, have anything to do with what the question asks. So, like here, if anyone comes across this response, they'll read the question, and before reading what I've typed, if they bother doing something that stupid that is, they'll just see that I've typed kinda a lotish on the subject. It looks like, to this person, that the following response is going to be me discussing how I feel about my dong. And they'll be like, wtf, who has this much to say about their dong, only a douchebag.

oh dude

can that fucken lobster right there be my bodyguard, or what?

come here

come here fucken lobster

come to papa

love you long time.

The lobster doesn't look like a robot to me... is it?

Either way, lobsters make great bodyguards, because they'll just be pinching the dickens out of anyone who crosses you. I mean, not really, because, idk if anyone has noticed, but lobsters have a real bad apathy problem. They just don't seem to care about anything. Yeah, nevermind, scrap the lobster idea.

How about that alien? Can the alien be my bodyguard? or is s/he/it just the one selling me the robot? Are the expensive? Because I have no money paper to buy them with.

hey, is that a disembodied head in a jar back there? Wait, it's a helmet. And it seems like the body is a washing machine. I do not want that as a bodyguard.

Ok, so, I guess that one with the sorta-Boba-Fett-looking-head, and the square vending machine body, tthat says "Mr. Chief" on it, is my best bet.
I want a robutt bodyguard instead of a human for a few reasons: Robutts are awesome. You don't have to pay them. This one's head looks sorta like Boba Fett.
had Boba Fett been a robot, perhaps he would have looked like this.
boba fett.
bo
bu
bulbasaur?
that's something else.

today, i sneezed until tears came outta my face.

I just wear what smells clean. I care, but all I care about is that it's clean...ish.
And isn't covered in like, feces or blood or anything.
But I guess that goes without saying, since if it were covered in such substances, it would probably not smell clean.

or maybe it would

i guess it depends on your preferences

Hey but, I think, deaf people experience music alreds. The part of a hearing person's brain that allows them to process and hear music, as something working in a harmony, and not just a bunch of random noises, still does this for a deaf person. They feel the vibrations in that part of their brain. They "feel" the music, rather than "hear" it, and it's a very similar experience.
When scientists scanned the brains of a hearing person, and a deaf person while music is playing, and they're focusing on it, the hearing person's brain, and the deaf person's brain show the same activity, in that part of their brains.

There was a famous deaf ballerina, Nina Falaise,she danced to the music by feeling the vibrations. Actually, I'm sure there are/have been many deaf dancers, this just happens to be the only one I know the name of.

I can hear, but I also think I can feel music. And it does seem to have so much to do with my own pulse and heartbeat, I can feel those things sorta change with the music.

There is some theory, that one of the reasons many of us develop (or maybe, are born with?) a great appreciation of music, is because in the womb, we felt the vibrations of our mother's heartbeat. And as early as six weeks,a fetus can actually hear, so at that point, they may be actually hearing the pattern of her heartbeat, along with loud sounds/music happening outside of their mothers.

SO, beat induction, is considered the foundation of music. And possibly, most of us are born with the ability to feel/recognize beat patterns, because of our mother's heartbeat, and what we could feel/hear in the womb.
Some people thought that was dumb, and said we learned how to follow beat patterns in the first few months of our lives, in the outside world, and weren't able to do it from the day, maybe even the moment, we're born.
But some other folks hooked two day old babies up to a machine, for scanning brain activity. They played a beat, that was a snare and bass drum. After they heard each beat, their brain activity would heighten. After they played this same recording a few times, they dropped the bass from every fourth beat. When they did that, the babies' brain activity displayed a disturbance that they call "mismatch negativity" which is something fully-developed brains do when we expect something to happen, in a pattern, but then the thing we expected, doesn't happen. So, the babies we're following this beat, at two days old. They recognized the changes in the beat.
Beat induction depends on hearing a pulse in music. But, pulses, can be felt, this foundation of music, is there for deaf people just as it is there for the hearing.

The hearing area of a deaf person's brain is not dysfunctional or disabled, really.
They can comprehend sound better than a hearing person will realize, which makes me feel like, it's the hearing people that are disabled.

To me, music isn't one language, it isn't limited, it doesn't leave anyone out.
How I see it, music is an infinite number of personal languages, for each of us.
It's not one identifiable cognitive capacity, but is constructed of multiple separate components. It isn't just noise, and voices. We all hear music differently. And in the same way that we might assume that a deaf person could never understand music, we also tend to assume that all hearing people hear music how we hear it, as the individual. And if someone dislikes something we like, we question their ability to hear well, or to judge well.
But that's all wrong. Each of us has something we hear first. It's true that pitch recognition varies from “tone deaf” to “perfect” and this influences abilities for musical memory, discrimination of melodies, awareness of changing harmony, and even the ability to keep time. And these are all things that affect how we hear music. But other components of music, like pulse, meter, and rhythm, along with sensitivities to timbre and the dynamics of tempo, are also important in determining what one of us hears, when we're listening to music.
For all these things to come together in a positive way for the listener, it requires understanding from the listener. Which is why I believe, there is no bad music, just music I don't understand, stuff I don't speak.

I could never "describe" music to anyone. I can, I guess, describe the way I experience it, not too well though since I'm not great with descriptions. But my describing how I experience music, is probably going to mean nothing, or even make no sense at all, to someone else.
I don't think that should discourage anyone from attempting to describe music, ON THE CONTRARY, I think that's all the more reason to try. But, it's like love, in that, I don't think anyone will ever be able to describe it big enough. No matter how many hours, weeks, it's just never going to do it justice. It's too big. And the experience is so profoundly different for each of us, but it /can/ be experienced by all of us, given we're conscious and willing. So yeah, like love. And I have to pee. I guess this could have been shorter. i could have just said "deaf ppl noe music alreds" so ok.

My mom taught me the phone number to the time and temperature. Which was a phone number, in a town we don't live in anymore, that you could call, and it would tell you the current time and temperature, in a robot lady voice. She taught it to me, because past 8PM, if you called it, a children's book on tape played. It told you a story, basically. Instead of the time and temperature. So, I called it, and would listen to the story. Which was always the same story, and I can't remember the story all that well, I think it was The Ugly Duckling. But I do remember the phone number, even though i was only 5ish when this was happening. I feel like that phone number is taking up valuable space in my mind, where I could remember something dirty or really, really, really useless information from some show I probably saw on Animal Planet. getoutofmyheadtimeandtemperature.

I'm really tired. I don't know why, I haven't done anything that used a lot of energy.
I don't even know if tired counts as an emotion.
But I've been tired, all day. My skin burns, everywhere, and I think I'm imagining that, from being so tired.
It feels like something heavy is sitting on my stomach. I was sitting here, with that feeling, so I wrapped one of my arms around me, which, I dunno, I think I actually sit like that even when I don't think I'm in pain, so but, my hand, was on my ribs, I was touching my ribs and I thought, why is that there. It feels wrong, it feels like it shouldn't be there.
I do that when I feel my spine sometimes. I don't know why it's here. But I hate the way it feels, and I just want it to go away. It's a bad feeling. I don't really understand it, it doesn't make any sense. I can't get away from it, because, there's nowhere I can go, where I can't feel myself. Just have to wait until it stops. And even if it stops, it's going to come back again, because I'll always be able to feel myself.I don't think that when I touch anything else. When I touch my dog, I don't think, why is this here, I hate the way it feels, it makes me want to scream, I want it gone. I've never thought it when I've touched another person. So I don't understand. But it makes me more tired than I already am. Tired enough, that, there's no point in sleeping, because I'll not have enough time to sleep the amount of hours it will take to make me not feel tired anymore.

The Chuckie doll?
Someone told me I looked like the Chuckie doll/puppet one time.
if that counts.

My teacher in 7th grade, said I looked like Mark Hamill.

Hey, Alyssa!
Well, I've seen Incubus, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Ghostland Observatory, Mount Eerie, The Dead Weather, and Andrew Jackson Jihad. I SAW TAME IMPALA, and The Growl (opened for them) the other week.
I nearly got to see Jack White last year, but none of that was able to happen.
His shows sell out ridiculously fast, I noticed.
For festivals, I went to Warped Tour 2010, there I saw The Dillinger Escape Plan, Sum 41, Closure in Moscow, and Andrew W.K.
I went to Lollapalooza, 2011, and Bonnaroo 2011.
I saw The Drums, Foo Fighters, Black Lips, My Morning Jacket, and Cold War Kids, at Lolla.
SADLY, The Kills and Bright Eyes played that Friday, and I wasn't there then, so I didn't get to see either of them.
Bonnaroo is in Tennessee , and you camp outside, MAYBE YOU KNOW THAT THOUGH, my whole family, 'cept for my mom, went to that. It was super hot and miserable outside, but is ok, was neat. I was eaten alive by mosquitoes. There, music-wise, I saw Graveyard, Futurebirds, School of Seven Bells, Deerhunter, Band of Skulls, Arcade Fire, NOFX, and Karen Elson. Karen Elson.
And I just looked at some of the folks that are gonna be at ur Bluesfest, looks pretty awesome, ANIMAL COLLECTIVE, I like dat. I wish you could go.
IF YOU AND I HAD A TIME MACHINE, we could go to Lolla last year, because they had everyone. Just like, everyone awesome.

And I'm okay, thanks! My springbreak doesn't start until March 29th. Which seems like, a long time. But I'm looking forward to it, because hopefully, it'll be warm, and junk. (do y'all call it springbreak in Canada?)
And i found out, The Flaming Lips, are going to be near me in late April, but the tickets are 70 dolla. I dunno. I would like to see them. But probably won't ever happen. I like the thought though.
It's cold and wet outside, and the weekend has been pretty uneventful because of that.
I just finished doing a lot of maths wrong. it took forevers. but I had to do it, before it got any later or I wasn't gonna do it, ya know.
I ate a soy burger today.
That was adventurous. it wasn't really bad. it wasn't good, but it wasn't bad.
My hands are cold.
Ok, I love you.