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All responses Most smiled responses
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How can you control who see the pictures, and ensure they are only Muslima sisters? What is the pictures are downloaded and shared via email with others outside of a restricted website? See earlier response as related to fashion, posing and modesty.
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There is nothing wrong having a blog. The question is what information will be posted on the blog. Two fashion blogs could be very different in content. One could have articles on attire to wear and the pros and cons. It could have modesty tips and other information without pictures of people. The second could have pictures of Muslima sisters, and even though they are in hijab, their pictures could be a temptation to others. Allah (SWT) ordered us to lower our gaze so we generally need to not stare at pictures and people, however our deen's spirit is modesty and humbleness. So it behooves us all, men or women to be modest. I would not post pictures for sisters online even if they are in hijab and specifically if they are fashion pictures. In fashion pictures the person tends to pose to illustrate the garment or apparel. I think a fashion blog is a great idea without the pictures of women. Maybe a picture of the garment without someone wearing it is more appropriate. Definitely articles, opinions, discussions on fabric brands are all valuable elements of a good Islamic fashion blog.without necessarily posting pictures of people, and Allah (SWT) knows best.
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Please see response to the first part of your question. And remember a strong Muslim is assertive, clear, direct, and courageous. Changing your seat is recommended to be further away from temptations, at the same time make sure you create your boundaries and prevent others from stepping into it.
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As salam alakom brother. Jazaka Allah kherian for your question. This is a question I get asked a lot by many your age and in college. There is no doubt that this is a form of daily struggle against the temptations and pressure of your female peers.
There are a number of ways to tackle this, first of all, make sure your intention is truly sincere, meaning that although "anyone would find it sort of appealing or flattering to be called nice names by others" we have to resist being a cause of temptation and fitna. So you must do your best to avoid attracting their attention and take active steps to stop it. We should not just walk away and smile.
(1) Always seek protection in Allah (SWT) throughout the day, as you leave home in the morning, make duaa to Allah (SWT) to protect you against Shaytan of jinn and mankind. Ask Allah (SWT) to make you eyes only see what is good and halal, and your ears to hear what is good and halal, and your mouth to say what is good and halal and your hands to touch what is good and halal, read Quran on your way to the bus stop or school if you ride a car or walk, recite Surah Al-Ikhlas, Al Falq and Al Nass (112-114) everyday on your way to school, recite Ayah Al-Kursi (2:255)
(2) Another way to do this you need to be assertive and clear, by saying something like, "I appreciate your comments, however I find them inappropriate, my religion and way of life teaches me to be modest and set limits which should not be exceeded, it would be ", in some causes a statement like this would be very effective, usually when this situation you describe happens the first time, however if it has been going on for a while, your tone will have to be a bit different, as you have already allowed them to comment with no clear position on how you accept their comments, so something more appropriate for "I noticed you have called me cute a few times, while it all sounds good, it makes me uncomfortable and they are not appropriate. My religion ..."
(3) In some cases the approach might not work, and they might not take you serious, or make fun of your comments. In such case you just need to be blunt, and say "I dont appreciate or like it it when you call me "hot" or "cute", and I prefer if you stop this"
(4) Another approach is to acknowledge their statements, they are looking for attention, and use the opportunity to give them dawa. So something like this. "Well, thanks, but I have no hand in how I look, whether I am cute or ugly, does not really define who I am. I respect people for who they are, for their actions and their values and not for their forms or shapes. God created us all and he is the one who formed us into who we are and what we look like, let me share with you this parable from the Quran" .. and then you can share a few ayat from Surah Al-Infitar (82:6-8), this will open the door to talk to them about Islam and Allah, and the creation, and our purpose on earth and what our duties are, and then the duty of boys (men) towards (women), etc.. and this could take over several weeks of dawa, You need to make sure however that you are strong enough and capable of sharing with them Islam in a modest and appropriate way where you are not in private and do not feel tempted or attracted to them.
(5) Remember prophet Youssef (pbuh) and the struggle he went through. The wife of the King did not just call him nice names, she ran after him, and pulled him and forced him to have a relationship with her; and he remembered his Lord, Allah, and refused and ran back. So make sure to always remember Allah (SWT) and seek his help, look forward to the better rewards in jannah, and look forward to a much better wife who is pious and righteous in this dunya that will bring you happiness inshaa Allah if you are patient like Youssef was. As Allah (SWT) says in the chapter of Al-Tallaq (58:2-3) whoever is fearful of Allah, and protects himself from the punishment of Allah, will be given a way out of his struggle and rewarded from where he would have never envisioned. So be sure and confident that if you stop liking their comments, indeed Allah will make a way out for you, but as long as you feel that you like their comments, that is an indication that your heart is not fully pure yet, you have not achieved full taqwa, once you feel their comments are no longer flattering, that is when you achieved taqwa, and with the will of Allah he will make a way out for your as he did for Youssef (pbuh)
(6) Be patient, this is a struggle and struggle comes with pain, in some cases you will need to ensure the pain. The pain could be that you might be called a gay person, rumors might spread that your are homosexual, or whatever other kids will say about you because you do not get along with girls, and this is when you need to not only be patient, but also preserve and be steadfast. Strong like a mountain, and assertive like a lion. Never be shaken or fearful of whatever gets said about you. Remember the prophet's wife Aisha was falsely accused of a relationship with one of the companions, and for a period of time it was a test for her, the prophet (pbuh) and the believers. Remember that Youssef (pbuh) was falsely accused of having a relationship with the wife of the king and was put into jail for such a lie and fabrication, so we are no different. We will be tested, and this is your test.
(7) Be modest in your outfits, try not to wear the latest and greatest gear you got. Make sure your outfit complies with a Muslim man, and that you cover below your knees, and that your pants are not loose from the top. Wear clothing that reflects your character not just as a Muslim but also some who deserves respect. I am not saying dress up like a nerd, but just make sure you are not wearing stuff that they find attractive, you can leave those things to other occasions, assuming of course they are modest an halal.
So these are some quick tips, that inshaa Allah we ask Allah to make them helpful. May Allah (SWT) give you strength and baraka and protect you and guide you and all of us to what he loves and pleases him and give a dwelling in jannah with the prophet (pbuh).
Stay in touch and please share this website with ohers. If there is anything good I said here, it is from the blessing of Allah (SWT), and if there is anything incorrect in what I said, I ask Allah (SWT) for forgiveness and avoid others from following it.
Wa as salam alakom.
--- Ayman Nassar
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As salam alakom dear believer in Islam
May Allah (SWT) strengthen your belief further and make you like Youssef (pbuh). The advice given above is the solution: Fast, Read Quran, Pray extra Nafl, seek Patience and remember Death. As Allah (SWT) says in the Quran, seek support through patience and prayer and indeed it is difficult except for those who fear "have khushoo" in Allah, who remember their return to their Lord, Al-Baqarah (45-46). It is important to set for your self some life goals, a clear mission for your life, clarify your future plans and get busy accomplishing them through schooling, work, knowledge, community services, and being a role model Muslim and that will keep you away from shaytan's whispers and your own desires. If you have not brought up the topic with your parents, you should and you should plan on proposing to the family of the sister in a couple of years inshaa Allah or once you feel you are more mature. Seeking advice from a mentor or life coach has worked well with similar cases in the past, and Allah (SWT) is the protector and guide, and the all knowing. --- Ayman -
Aslamualikum brother,
Our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him) reminded us that marriage is half of our Deen and stated: "Nikah (marriage) is my Sunnah. He who shuns my Sunnah is not of me." (Muslim)
What about those who are young and are not in yet financially able to support a wife and raising a family? Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) advised us to fast in this situation.
Narrated 'Abdullah : We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatever. So Allah's Apostle said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power." Sahih Bukhari
Remaining patient until marriage is jihad as one must resist temptations to talk, date, etc. In addition to fasting, set short term and long-term goals that will put you in a position where you are able to support a wife and a family. Put your trust in Allah (swt) and do your best as Allah (swt) says in the Quran: "And whoever fears Allah and keeps his duty to him, he will make a way for him to get out (from every difficulty) and he will provide him from (sources) he never could imagine. And who ever puts his trust in Allah, then he will suffice him" (Surah At-Talaaq: 2,3)
May Allah (swt) give you patience and success in remaining steadfast on the path of our beloved Prophet (pbuh)
-Mahmoud -
You should not learn knowledge from someone who is ignorant in the knowledge or has problems explaining things correctly even if he has the proper knowledge. You should use wisdom and gentle words to convince your husband to learn from you, other scholars, read books and check out reliable websites. For example you may wish to purchase a book and read at home and then leave it around the house so he can see it and read it himself, and then let him teach you from the book. Your husband probably has some pride to learn from his wife, so to gradually let him accept the idea of learning from you, use patience and some indirect wise opportunities as the example given above. We know about Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) and how she taught dozens of believing men the practices of the prophet (pbuh) and many aspects of the deen. She would give classes in the masjid and hold knowledge sessions for the community for both men and women, and Allah knows best.
----- Dr. Ramadan Abdelbaset -
This money should be given out to someone needy, you should not take them back and keep them. If your brother is returning the money not knowing that it was zakat and thinking it was a gift, then when you receive the money back you should not hold on to it and instead give it to another needy person as zakat or donate it for a cause that meets the requirements of zakat spending.
---- Ustath Wagee Abdelmageed -
No, she is not considered a sibling sister. She is like any stranger to the two boys, and hence all the rulings of marriage and interacting with non-mahram men apply. When they reach puberty they should not mix in the home without the presence of their parents, and should not be left alone in the house.
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Yes, ILIA receives and distributes zakat donations. Money collected for zakat through ILIA is spent on providing financial assistance for families struggling to pay their rent, food support, transportation support, job counseling, financial aid for needy students and internship money for needy youth
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This is available to students pursuing a major in business, leadership, management or teaching. ILIA trains the interns on various areas related to instruction, training, public speaking and the subject matter. The intern shadows ILIA instructors during training sessions, assists in preparation of handouts, performs support duties during workshops and training programs. Interns are also trained on grading student answer books. Most courses are offered on weekends, so weekend availability is a requirement, also ability to drive or secure transportation to training locations and ILIA's offices. This internship is available in the greater DC region (MD, VA, PA, DE, DC) only. Interns are required to attend for at least one quarter. For more information feel free to email us at hr@islamicleadership.org or complete our internship form online at http://iliajobs.blogspot.com/
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Yes, inshaa Allah it will be held in late Sept in Herndon, VA, the exact date is not confirmed yet, inshaa Allah we expect to have it confirmed and announced soon. Tentative date is Sept 25th.pending confirmation from facility operator.
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Wa alakom as salam .. there are a number of internships for high school and college students.
Marketing and Public Relations
Dawa and Outreach
Training and Instruction
Accounting and Finance
Writing and Editing
Leadership and Management
Video and Multimedia Production
Business Planning and Entrepreneurship
You may complete a brief form online and someone will get in touch with you with details based on your level and areas of interest.
All internships objective are to help you develop your leadership skills and serve the society at large through application of Quran and sunnah in our activities and work.
Ayman -
Walikum Asalam. ILIA's programs are designed to build leadership skills in youth and adults based on the Quran and Sunnah. For example, the Youth Project Management program teaches youth how to successfully manage a project and design a project plan. After completing the course, the youth are assigned a real life project that fulfills an identified need in their community. Another program that we recently conducted, Make the Click-Bridge the Gap, was designed to help parents overcome the challenges and barriers that are common in parent-teen relationships in America. The parents are given real-life scenarios and common barriers teenagers and parents encounter. They then learn how to apply the Quran and Sunnah in these situations to strengthen family bonds and become role models for other parents and their youth.
These programs help build self confidence because participants go out and apply the skills and knowledge they learned to become role models for other youth and help benefit their communities. -
Allah (swt) says: "Call to the path of your Lord through wisdom, beautiful preaching, and argue with them by that which is best, Verily your Lord knows who has strayed and He knows who is guided (on the straight path)" You can use this opportunity to remind your brother about the benefits of prayer as Allah made clear in the Quran: "Establish regular Prayer: for Prayer restrains from shameful and unjust deeds; and the remembrance of Allah is the greatest (thing in life) without doubt. And Allah knows the (deeds) that ye do" (29:45). Also, Allah (swt) says "If you thank Me, I will give you more" (14:7) Thus, prayer should not be seen as a burden but as an opportunity to cleanse one's sins and increase one's good deeds and blessings in this life and the next.
There are many distrations on college campuses. So it is important for your brother to spend time with his fellow Muslim students in activities for the sake of Allah. This is what Allah (swt) made clear in the Quran: "And stay with (have patience with) those who call on their Lord morning and evening, seeking His Face; and let not thine eyes pass beyond them, seeking the pomp and glitter of this Life". Your brother's friends in the MSA will help him stay strong on the right path and remind him of what pleases Allah (prayer, reading Quran, fasting, paying zakat, community service, etc). The MSA will also offer him the opportunity to utilize his talents to make a difference on campus and on his community. This will inshaAllah strengthen his faith and increase his love for Islam. -
At this age it is very normal for young men to spend time with their peers. It is part of their normal development. The important aspect is to know who is he hanging out with, and know them. You also want to discuss gently with wisdom and good advice some guidelines and etiquette that your son should follow such as coming back home at a certain time, calling if he will be late, staying in touch with you every 2 hrs or so, even if it is still not past his return time to inform you of his whereabouts. It important to get to know closely his peers and friends, and meet them once in a while. Staying in touch with your sons peers is very important and bridging the gap with your son, and also giving you a sense of confidence on his status
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Inshaa Allah on June 19th, 2010 in Herndon, VA
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Leadership with graciousness and compassion
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Ask us a question, we will do our best. Indeed Allah (SWT) is the all knowing. ILIA is a non-profit organization, our mission is to develop and nurture leadership skills based on the Quran and sunnah. You may ask personal questions related to leadership.
