A princess! For real.

That's a really interesting question! Well, first of all, quite honestly - romantic love has nothing to do with once a year holidays. I don't personally celebrate the day. I genuinely feel that when you love someone, you show them in various ways over time; I don't need a big fuss on an arbitrary day to prove my intent. I think it puts a lot of undue pressure on people, and fosters commercialism.

I think I am referring more to enduring love above, which hopefully has aspects of romance in it. To me, romantic love is being thoughtful, listening, remembering the little things that are specific to me and responding to them -- and vice versa. It could be picking up a piece of apple pie from that fabulous bakery just because I know you love it, for no reason, or coming home to a dinner of one of my favourite dishes. To me, romance is a flame to be cradled. It's fragile, and important. It takes thought and intentionality. And honestly, it's not the be all and end all!

WHAT? SKITTLES?! WHERE?

I mean. Um, yes, in certain contexts, I have been known to enjoy Skittles as a treat. As a rule, I don't really eat a lot of candy. But I do like Skittles! And, of course, good chocolate can't be beat.

LOVE snow. Love love love it. I love being outside in the snow, love working in it, skiing, snowshoeing, fishing, rolling in it after a sauna, you name it. I grew up in the snow. It's going to be a fair bit of snowfall here, and I only wish I had more time to enjoy it.

It's always lovely viewed from indoors, whilst in front of a cosy fireplace, or in bed, with the curtains open.

I'm always excited. Each day is full of latent possibility.

Now, whether I fuck it up or do something great with it, that's up to me.

Well, you have to indicate to the person that you do not want your message posted. It is a one-sided medium, so, you either have to trust that they will comply, or, sadly, don't do it. Most people are pretty good though, if you just want to send a private message. Usually, 'This is a private message, please do not post' is more than adequate. :) Hope that helps.

Well, if not, then why ask? :)

Hi Anon! I was making light of the situation. The problem is that you are anonymous, and so I have no idea who is asking me. Which is too bad, because whatever my response, I may know of other like-minded ladies. If you want to send me a private message, just tell me not to post it :). I won't.

How do you answer questions like these?! I mean, picture it... you're out, in a restaurant, sitting there at a table, and the waiter comes up and asks if you'll be dining alone and you have to say 'No, I'm here with anonymous! Can't you see them?'

Any man with confidence and openness. Sexy comes in many different iterations.

Peut-être!

PLS

Hmmm... good question. While I tend to drink wine more, I love a beer that is really flavour-rich, not light and weak. I enjoy a good white beer in the Belgian style, with a pronounced coriander taste, or a yummy, simple brown ale, or a full-bodied stout. I prefer small craft breweries, and especially like Belgian style beers. So, no favourites - I don't kiss and tell.

Yes, I love food. What can I say? And no, I can't answer a question directly, or without some editorialisation!

I've got two.

Oh, desire to provide --- did your comment get cut off?

Thank you so much. Really, I appreciate you taking the time to comment. It was funny, as I noticed a photo the other day of this sensuous drip down a woman's chest, and I thought - mmm, right feeling, but just not the same. When I saw the orchid this morning, I just had to post it.

That sensual flower, that sensual sensation. Half-awake, barely sentient... I hadn't, ahem, taken care of things when I was still in bed as I wanted to revel in the feeling a little. And then, shortly after getting up, this feeling... slowly slipping the hem of the dress I had thrown on up my thighs to find that sweet honey glistening as it slipped down my leg, well, what's a girl to do?

I am so glad it took you over the top, and hope you enjoy the thought, imagining all the things that followed after I traced a finger down that sweet, wet rivulet...

It's a great city, isn't it?

Ah, cheers! No problem. I am good at thinking through, and pretty great at making mistakes. Thankfully, I can admit and reflect, and do.

To me, communication is key, as is managing expectations - yours, and the other person's. You are not responsible FOR the other person, but, you are responsible for what you put out there. So, be mindful, be careful, be creative, and hopefully, you can meet the same.

And then you can *really* let loose!

That it doesn't matter who was there before, or who comes afterward; I am here with you know, and that's where I chose to be.

It's hard to say, all men are different, and I like to respond to the situation!

Well, I think the first thing they should do is ensure that it is something that they would *both* like, and set out clear boundaries and guidelines for themselves on what they would like to explore and how.

Nobody likes to be third party to drama.

If you decide that it is something you'd like to pursue, and you have an idea of what you'd like to pursue (ie, someone to watch? participate? serve? hold the camera?), put your idea out there. I guess, the usual suspect would be Craigslist, or any sort of local adult dating/classified site that exists in your community (comme ReseauContact). If you are looking for someone that is open to being with a couple, or exploring open relationships, consider looking into the events offered in or around your community, in the swinger/ fetish/ polyamoury interest groups. They may exist online, or not at all, but, it is worth a look.

Once you have found someone you think might be a suitable match, take your time. Like any relationship, whether it's a temporary fling or a long-term arrangement, getting to know someone a bit before proceeding to the fun can help you have more realistic expectations. Also, check in with your mate again. Are you both sure that this is what you want, and who you want it with?

Take time to discuss expectations, boundaries, fantasies, and limits with the person you are looking to explore with. Be clear. Start off with realistic goals. Check in often. Try to get a feel for what their communication style is, so hopefully there are not mixed messages. Be clear about the status and 'type' of relationship you want with this person. Are you looking for a play partner, or a polyamourous life partner? Communication is key!

Even if it's a one time thing, it's often appreciated when one expresses thanks for sharing an intimate moment. You don't have to send flowers (although! no, I kid, really - don't want to send the wrong message), but a simple, thanks, we had a good time would be nice. If you are not sure where things will lead, or, if you would like to continue the arrangement, be clear with the other person. Don't leave them hanging. Basic niceties still apply when you're trying to be naughty!

If you do decide to continue your arrangement, repeat the steps above (minus the searching for someone to repeat them with). Make sure that you and your primary partner check in with each other often. Make sure to 'check in' with your third party about boundaries and expectations on an on-going basis. Most of all, have fun!

I mention these things out of common sense, not out of any great experience in this area. I find it all too common that we DON'T rely on our common sense in a lot of situations, and end up hurt or discouraged. Be realistic, be patient, and hopefully, you will be able to find what you are looking for.

Some final tips, which, to me, are paramount.
* Protect your privacy, and respect hers.
* Meet in public. ALWAYS. And please. MEET BEFORE YOU PLAY! Don't walk into a situation blind.
* Protect yourself (and your partner). As much as you can get a 'feel' for someone in conversation over coffee, you can't see who they've been with and vice versa. Love yourself - wear protection.
* Don't get carried away... Don't make the situation into more than it is, and don't allow your third party to either. Be clear about expectations and limits, and hopefully, no one gets (emotionally) hurt.
* Make sure your primary partner knows how important your primary relationship is. Don't sacrifice your real life for a part-time fantasy.

I have to admit, I am drawing on my thoughts about what I would tell my girlfriends or guy friends if they were looking for a partner, and expanding it a little. I absolutely welcome comments from anyone else that is more experienced in this area :) Best of luck!

WOW! Now THAT'S a question... sure, there is so much to see and think about when exploring Tumblr. Of course, my initial reaction, in the heat of the moment, in the intrigue and interest, is yes... but, then the reality sets in. I am actually quite particular and protective of who I share my time and my self with. And to consider something... well, I consider all sorts of things all the time - in, on, around. So many permutations. Thanks for the question!