Ask me anything
Recent Responses
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Sorry to answer this 7 months later, but I forgot my password and that I had a formspring. But please, don't let my tardiness diminish your question or my answer:
Yeah fucking right. -
This clearly shows how little I actually know about matters such as these (but isn't that why I'm on tumblr?)(to be informed!), so I thank you greatly.
Maybe I should get one. I mean, not anytime soon with money and the economy and shit like that being such as it is, but maybe one day. Though, if it were called "iphone panda" I'd buy the shit out of that. That just sounds awesome. -
THIS IS NOT A QUESTION!
It's just a true statement, I suppose. Clearly I'm not just winning the hearts and minds of tumblrdom, I'm conquering them. Thanks, reader. -
Trabajo en la biblioteca del pinche. soy el juguete del malvado. soy el guarda del conocimiento prohibido. yo me imagino que usted huele muy agradable.
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Oh, I know who this is. Hello :)
The answer is: Right now! Before I even finish typing this, I'll be gone. By the time you read this, I'll be on your doorstep. It'll be the weirdest, dirtiest, naughtiest Christmas ever, and when reflected back on, it'll probably be the most haziest too, but ah well, isn't that the nature of things?
Christ, I wish. I could use a vacation so badly right now. And it'd be wonderful to see you. -
Do I have a beard? No, not at the moment. Why, are you offering? HA HA! But seriously.
Like most men, I have experimented in the past with my own manly attributes and have dabbled in the weird facial hair department.
The first time: Having moved from California to Virginia, living in an apartment over the summer while waiting for school to start, and fighting off oblivion and a heavy case of depression. I never shaved, drank a lot of Pepsi, rented movies from Blockbuster every day, had sex with the girl who lived in the apartment above me, and worked on bad ideas for screenplays. In addition, I put on a few pounds, grew my hair long and kept it constantly slicked back and grew the aforementioned beard. It was fluffy like clouds full of sadness. I looked like a teenage Orson Welles. And I was probably the only guy my age at the time who got the reference.
The second time: A few years ago. I just gave up on life after a break up, grew a cross between a hobo beard and a van dyke beard. I listened to a lot of Mogwai's Young Team back then. It was weird.
Now, for the real question: Has anyone ever shat in my beard? Hmm. Shit. I don't know, man. I feel like I'm copping out on answering that one there, but I'm sorry, I just don't know/remember. Why, are you offering?
And my feelings on Iraq and Twilight are about the same: GTFO! -
Pornographic, huh? Maybe because I'm a guy and I tend to think of things as big and phallic, but it seems like ecstasy in reverse to me. Unless your porn involves melting, but I get where you're coming from.
But, actually, your question is a funny one. No, I have never microwaved a Peep. Partly because, well, I'm not psychotic. BUT! I have made a pizza out of Peeps before. No joke. Back in high school, I used to work at a Little Caesars in a K-Mart and a friend wanted to try a Peeps pizza. So, I threw 7 or 8 of the little yellow fuckers on a pizza and threw it in the oven. It came out looking like a pizza with a lot of gross sunny side eggs on it. The friend ate it. He described it was, "Really sweet. Really, really sweet. Horribly so." And then he ran into the bathroom and threw up. His porn is different from yours and mine, friend. -
The future! The past! Space! My own subconscious! Inside your thought process! Your bedroom! Also, maybe some place like Greece? That sounds like fun, right?
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Marco Sparks’s Bio
Internetopolis.
Man, I don't know. Aren't you supposed to tell me?
