Eating disorders are very isolating illnesses, so it is typical to feel ashamed. I was so afraid to ask for help for such a long time, because I thought my behaviors were my fault. I thought they were embarrassing. I would binge in secret, exercise in secret, and skip meals while telling others I had already eaten. It was an awful cycle that was difficult to overcome.

I want to urge you to reach out for help anyway, no matter how ashamed you may be of your behaviors. ED will make you feel awful about yourself, but know that IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT.

Every part of my therapy was beneficial, but I think the most useful was actually group therapy and nutritional therapy. In group therapy, I finally found people who knew EXACTLY what was going through my mind and body. In nutritional counseling, I learned the truth about nutrition, and learned the myths of diet scams. I also learned to trust my nutritionist which led me, in turn, to trust my body over time.

Please also know that recovery is not linear by any means. It spirals. It has hills and valleys. There will be ultimate highs, and there will be unbearable lows. I still have days (or weeks at a time) where I slip up and binge or overexercise or skip meals. But, the longer you stick with recovery, the better it will get, slowly but surely. That I can promise you.