The most Ancient and Wise Vampyre Oracle; all knowledge is mine to impart as I see fit.

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    1. Krayven
      one year ago
      godvamp

      Krayven loves conventions! In your experience which is the most annoying: too-serious Klingons, dark-elf douches or yaoi fangirls with those obscene paddles.

      How can one EVER find paddles OBSCENE? I have many paddle stories.

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    2. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      I hear one of the slayers after you has enrolled in university courses. what are your thoughts on this matter?

      Master's Degree, Doctorate, Associate's, whatever... means NOT A DAMN THING when DEATH is on the line!

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    3. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      I have heard there might be one or two openings in your DnD game. Specifically, two openings. Which two characters bit the dust? Was it the bard? I bet one was a bard.

      Nay, the bard always seems to live to go dance about and tell the tale; however, the gnomish monk is thankfully GONE. Oh, and the Undead Slayer. He wasn't going to last anyways.

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    4. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      'E is for Egotheism' 'F is for...'?

      Further destruction of your face.

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    5. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      Krayven...In your infinite wisdom...WHo is the hotter slayer...Derek or Chris(ooooww...wioth that chin)<sigh>?

      Are you F@#&*ING KIDDING ME?!

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    6. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      Which reactions to the face punching tells you the color of your target's soul?

      Study ancient texts; unlock the myriad of secrets from ancient peoples who wrote said ancient texts; come back and talk to me in about 100 years. I'll still be here! Will you? PROBABLY NOT.

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    7. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      What are your feelings about Doctor Who, the television series?

      What are your feelings about being UTTERLY DESTROYED?

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    8. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      In D&D 3.5, if a prestige class allows you to "choose an energy type" to get 10 resistance to, would that include Sonic as a possible energy type to choose?

      SO you're trying to say "Sonic energy"...? That makes no sense at all; no wonder D&D is going down the crapper. Bring back The Strategic Review!

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    9. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      Are you an ostrich?

      asked by wajardo

      Yes. I am an ostrich.

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    10. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      How can you tell the color of ones soul?

      Simple; punch someone in the face and see how they react.

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    11. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      If you felt the need to have a few drinks but there was only time for one(1), would you choose a physically fit idiot or a highly intelligent obese slob?

      NO BRAINER, that... Krayven is dedicated to ALL FORMS of physical fitness!

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    12. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      What would be a good question to ask an all powerful vampire?

      Not that one.

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    13. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      'C is for Critical Hit?' and 'D is for ...?'

      Destroying your face.

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    14. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      If you wrote a book called 'Krayven's Alphabet of Manliness', what would some of the chapters be named? 'A is for Armageddon... B is for...?'

      Badassery.

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    15. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      I heard a rumor that you are the creator of St Patrick's Day. Is it true?

      Yes.

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    16. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      What's the real story behind Daylight Savings time?

      I'm not sure, because there's no such thing as Daylight Savings Time. I know of Daylight SAVING Time, but obviously you didn't mean that or else you'd've said it.

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    17. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      Do you play pool? If so, where can you normally be found doing this when not in your own magnificent palace of Krayvitude?

      Trying to sniff out where the mighty Krayven hangs out?! Ha. Won't work.

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    18. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      If you were a bird, what type of house cat would kill you only to leave you on the doorstep step as a gift?

      Were I a BIRD, no pathetic house cat would be ABLE to kill me so this question is stupid.

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    19. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      I only want to spend one year learning a foreign language. Which language is the sexiest to girls? French, Latin, Italian, Babylonian, etc? And what's your best line in that language?

      I scoff at anyone needing language to impress GIRLS. I, Krayven, am only interested in WOMEN and have natural traits which are alluring to the females. Oh yes... yes indeed. But perhaps you should learn French. I speak MANY tongues, from ancient Aramaic-Sumerian to heretofore UNKNOWN languages from the 9 Layers of Hell... sort of a glottal-type noise punctuated by what almost sounds like a sneeze; YOU wouldn't understand because its the language of DEMONKIND so I'm not even sure why I bother to try to educate you.

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    20. Krayven
      2 years ago
      godvamp

      Would you choose Debbie or Elfstar (for a week)? Elfstar is inducted into the Temple of Diana and has real magic, but Debbie looks good in black and does seem gullible and easily persuaded by anything. Blackleaf is dead, and thus Marcie doesn't exist.

      Oh yes... Elfstar... very nice... very shapely. Debbie is retarded and Marcie is just insane.

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Krayven’s Bio

I'm a damn Vampire, with a capital "V". You may also call me a Vampyre, a Whamphyr, Nosferatu, or simply Magnificent... for I am all of these things.... and more.

You come seeking knowledge from one as ancient, omniscient, and POWERFUL as I...

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