This one’s a little tough for me because in my circle of close friends, very few of us are parents. My exposure to these kinds of situations is low, so I’m going to answer this one based on instinct alone and hope I don’t hose you. (Of course, commenters are welcome to jump in and give me a hand, too.)

There are few things in life people are more proud of than their children. This especially goes for first-time parents, and when you add the anxiety and guilt of having Snowflake in the custody of anybody but Mom and Dad, the situation gets even worse.

The direct approach in this case (much like, “Holy crap, your kid is faaaaaaaat!”) will likely do more harm than good. Nobody wants to be told about a great night out, and oh, by the way, your ill-behaved kids aren’t invited. So, try a little reverse psychology — a “Mom and Dad night on the town,” if you will. Drinks, dinner, post-dinner drinks — you know, a grown-up night. Now, this may cost you a little bit up front, but once you break this seal, your chances of seeing Mom and Dad sans Snowflake likely go up exponentially.

Oh, and suck it up once in a while. That little bit of goodwill every so often keeps the wheels greased.