Ask me anything
Recent Responses
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This type of misogyny is pretty common after a person has been rejected over and over again. Don't give up hope. If you really work on yourself with a good therapist you might still be able to have a functional relationship at some point.
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Aw!! I miss you too! Sirius and I had an amicable breakup and we're still friends.
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I'll probably wear some kind of jeans/heels/skimpy top combo. Today it's overcast, but generally the weather has been perfect and you can totally get away with wearing your hair down.
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This is tricky. Lesbians tend to be mistrustful of women with male partners. Not all lesbians all the time, but I'm not gonna lie to you. the bias exists.
Sleep with other bi women and women who identify as poly. You wont experience the same resistance to your partner as you will in the womyn lovin womyn crowd. -
How many times did you ask this woman out? There has to be more to this story.
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Safer sex options between lesbians...
1. Phone sex (I'm a big fan)
2. Watching CSI while sitting next to each other on the couch (big fan of this one too)
3. Talking dirty to each other while mutually masturbating (another one I love!)
4. Latex gloves
5. Always put condoms on toys
6. Keep lots of condoms handy in case you want to switch toys. Or holes.
7. Rolling around on top of each other like giant pandas is generally safe
8. Rimming (I'm being serious. If she's freshly showered and you are licking her externally you're fine.)
9. Showering together (this is a good precursor to #8)
10. Talk about STDs before you do anything that involves fluid exchange.
Generally our people are blessed. We can't knock up our girlfriends and generally don't get a lot of STDs. This is NOT to say that we can't get them. We can and do. But comparatively speaking, we're less at risk for contracting things than our straight and gay male pals.
The most commonly transmitted STD between women is HPV, but my gyno says the entire world already has it and if you've never had symptoms it's only because you're immune system managed to do something about it. Talk frankly with your partner about her sexual history and use gloves until you know each other and decide to sleep with each other exclusively. -
Wow thank you!! I'm super flattered. It's really nice of you to say that. (and I will totally get that check in the mail to you.)
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Ithaca is heavy on the lesbians, yes. But moving without a ring? To Ithaca? Here's what I know about Ithaca, it's famous for having hosted the world's largest human peace sign. I read that on wikipedia.
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Is this stranger attractive? I usually order a Bombay Sapphire martini, up with olives. This pretty much ensures I will get hammered and go home with her.
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You're only 17. What do you have to offer a sugar mama other than possible jail time?
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You really need to be more creative about this flirting thing. Aggressive femme flirting is like topping from the bottom--a skill most femmes are born with.
Playing coy is aggressive if you are doing it right. But if by playing coy you mean just sitting there waiting for someone to notice you... well that's not coy; that's lazy.
I'm of the opinion that butches can be separated into two categories. One type will just hit you over the head with a club and drag you off to her lair. The other type wants you to chase her while making her feel like she's courting you.
I've dated both types and they each have their merits, but each require a slightly different approach. For the former you wont need much more than a push-up bra. The latter is trickier and can be real pain in the ass. My girlfriend is of the latter variety and my god did she make me work for it. I was going to either fall madly in love with her or hold a pillow over her face while she slept.
Give me a little more information about you, what kind of women you are attracted to, and what the dating scene is like where you are so I can better tailor my advice. -
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I'll totally answer this if you can tell honestly me why you want to know. I mean, is your interest prurient or sociological?
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Go on a special date to a martini bar where he/she can wear her cutest Frank Sinatra inspired get up to impress you. Just don't drink more than two martinis or you'll be too drunk for sex.
If she likes fashion, get her a tie clip, they are tres chic right now. Go for something very plain and classy in sterling silver.
Or cook for her. Everyone loves to be cooked for. Make her a special meal, dress up in something sexy, and serve it to her. -
Second wave feminism was (is?) plagued by transphobia. It’s not limited to Daly and Dworkin, so I don’t see a reason to single them out. But a more useful discussion would include transphobia in current feminism, because it’s not like transphobia has been eradicated. In fact, I find transphobia in current feminism, the LGBT movement, and mainstream (read: homophobic, transphobic, sexist, racist, classist) society even more troubling because it’s empirical evidence of our lack of progress.
Also, limiting the discussion to the second-wave would mean criticizing the work of many revolutionaries who, though short-sighted and stuck in an essentialist view of what it means to be man and woman, still paved the way for the rest of us to wonder what the terms man and woman really mean. I’m not making excuses here, we all know how lacking previous waves of feminist thought have been and that non-white, straight, middle-class, non-trans women were either ignored or met with open hostility. That exclusion held all of us back, including the women who fit all those labels.
I tend to pick and choose and take what I can from different thinkers, reserving my criticism for feminists whose thought hasn’t evolved in thirty years. Germaine Greer comes to mind here, The Female Eunuch was a huge, huge influence on me and I will forever think she’s brilliant in that book. But the fact that she still talks that transphobic smack about “pantomime dames” from The Whole Woman (1999) just makes her seem stupid and lazy. (I’m referring to the comments she made in the Guardian about Caster Semenya). -
I like it when women are hard on me. Or er, have hard-ons. Maybe I have no idea what you are asking.
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Last night I dreamed I was evacuating a menagerie of cute fluffy animals from the back of a white van in order to save them from a serial killer. Someone suggested I might be a plushie, but I'm really not a fan of cute fluffy animals.
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