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When I worked in a movie theater, there were "ushers" (a general term I use even though we did a lot more than that), supervisors, and management. If you were lucky enough to become a supervisor, you got to wear a company polo with a stripe of grey on it (and make a couple quarters an hour more). From there if you became a manager, you wore a suit (and made a couple more dollars an hour).
Supervisors, in my eyes anyway, had a position of respect, managers had power. (This was before of course I had been trained to detest the value of company loyalty and still gave respect to position instead of people.) After working there a couple years I had seen promotions into both categories. People that started working the same day I did had now become supervisors, or even managers.
Before I left the theater I had come to understand two things.
1) The people that became supervisors and managers weren't really any different than the day they started.
2) Some days even managers had to pick up a broom and sweep a theater.
Conclusion: sometimes the only difference between a manager and an usher is manager has to wear a suit. -
Tonight?! Kind of late in the game, isn't it? I wouldn't try anything too ambitious at this point. You'll either need to find something quick and simple or highlight the fact that you're poorly prepared. For instance, maybe dig out a nice suit, put on a nametag and go as someone at a cooperate retreat. Carry around flashcards with buzzwords and topic starters. Have an always unfinished drink in your hand and give out business cards that say something like "Directing Supervisor of Official Tasks".
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I'M BEING BOTHERED BY THIS THING CALLED *LIFE*. It's so annoying.
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The old ones had faulty radioactive cores that were leaking.
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What would it take? WHAT WOULD IT TAKE?! YOU WANT TO KNOW? DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW? IS THIS SOMETHING YOU THINK YOU CAN HANDLE? YEAH? DO YA? WELL HERE YOU GO. I. HOPE. YOU'RE. HAPPY. :)
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Can I have a third option?
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I am 100% against them and this is why: I believe in til death do us part. And how does that figure in to a zombie marriage? Does it not count because you're already dead? Legally this could have far reaching problems. As we've seen from the vampire community, they abuse their immortality by playing the economy to get rich. If one were to enter into a binding contract with a zombie, you could potentially be trapped in it forever.
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Well Sammy, while Texas and Nevada are both desert environments, a key thing to keep in mind are the Sierra Nevada mountains, named after the software company that developed the games "King's Quest" and "Leisure Suit Larry". As we all know, the farther down you dig into the earth, the colder it is, and if you've noticed the top of mountains are also quite cold! This is because of core veins inside mountains that take cooler air from below up to its peak. This process, called "convection" is what pushes up the crust and forms mountains. It also cools the surrounding air, causing clouds to form, which become heavy with ice, and thus with the added weight float down to the valley where they dissipate, making any libraries in the area much cooler than they would be in Texas.
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Because right now Seth is writing a book about a guy that got left at the altar and is barely capable of taking care of himself. And then after that he's going to be writing a book about a girl that gets wasted at an outdoor concert and is saved by a stranger she can't remember so she tries to find him. It's like a reverse Cinderella. And also he's working on writing a picture book about a Giraffe that's too tall for school, a series of books that are basically 80's action movie in text form, a couple YA ideas that he's been planning, and besides all that he's still trying to get his art up to par while working two part time jobs, and is going back to finish college soon.
But that's besides the point. He's not writing a book about a haunted airline terminal because he got his first kiss in a movie theater while watching The Terminal so writing a book about a haunted airline terminal might do a number on him psychologically. -
Because, truth be told, he's using different technology. Back in the late 70's, anthropology students from a New England college discovered a major find while researching conditions in a New York slum: ancient alien technology. Details are scarce, but we know two things: First, it would drastically change the way we used our own modern tech. Second, there wasn't enough to go around.
Due to the nature of the alien technology (it only works via a wireless connection with painfully installed brain implants) not everyone lucked out. Those with implants intrinsically understand the workings of any modified alien/human tech hybrids, like copy machines. To those without implants, it's not unlike trying to read a manual in a made up language. -
Because this isn't Canada. Nobody knows what Boxing day is in the U.S., besides A) It's from Canada and B) it's not nearly as violent as the name suggests.
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Marsha c'mon I know our divorce was tough but I'm not looking to get back together. This isn't a sitcom. Our fake relationship was REAL, dammit. As real as all the imaginary children we sent to boarding schools.
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Have you ever seen Attack of the Killer Tomatoes? Little known fact: it's based on a true story! In 1826 the small town of Clarence, Massachusetts was besieged for two weeks by an aggressive growth of pumpkins. While not entirely sentient the pumpkins made use of the rolling hills of Clarence to terrify the townsfolk by rolling after them. There were many human injuries, thousands of dollars in property damage, and one dead horse. The solution was a yearly culling of the wild pumpkin population. Nobody is sure who had the idea to spitefully carve into the vegetables but ever since it has been popular to give the pumpkin a fearsome face to represent the malice the people of Clarence felt the pumpkins had.
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First you have to ask yourself: "How awesome was my library previously?" Just as wind chill may change the perceived temperature, a difference of awesomeness may make a library, or any work place, seem suckier than it actually is.
As for what causes actual suckage, there are a few factors, of which one or all may be an issue. The biggest issue for most people are sucky coworkers. Good coworkers can nullify anything else that sucks about the library, bad coworkers can ruin a perfectly good library environment. For supervisors/bosses this goes double.
Another issue may be the building itself. Is it old? Cramped? Does it have poor natural lighting and faulty wiring? Was poorly planned, making it difficult to see creepy people in your maze of shelving? Also do some research and see if it wasn't built on an ancient Native American burial ground. There may be a curse and it may be possible to lift said curse. Seek professional help when attempting.
Library policy can also be problamatic. Even if your library is well bit and staffed by friendly, professional souls, if you still have to use a card catalog or a typewriter and nobody, including the library director, knows why, you will be driven insane before long.
A cause of suckage that is out of your control, of course, is the patrons and local environment. If your library is in a low income neighborhood, odds are your patrons are mostly hobos, crazy people, and crazy hobos that angrily proclaims everyone wants to have "gay sex" with them and claims to often see knife fights in public bathrooms. If your library is in a well to do neighborhood, your patrons are probably all Caucasian soccer moms who will complain about your Hispanic coworkers and angrily demand to see your manager every time they have a twenty five cent late fee. Your library is probably much better lit but unfortunately all you will be seeing are Victoria Secret's sweatpants.
You have few solutions if you library sucks. The first is to wait it out. In all but the most extreme cases a library will cycle through being "awesome" and "sucky" every few years. By the time you are ready to retire the library should be awesome again.
You can also try to improve your coworkers lives little by little via buying them lunch, helping them with work or just being nice in general. Happy coworkers will go a long way to stopping suckage.
Another solution is to attempt larger, sweeping, positive changes in the way the library works. You will quickly become censured, shunned and forced to quit at which point it is no longer your problem and you can watch the library burn (metaphorically) from the comfort of the unemployment office. -
Because deep down they know that they are as much a puppet to the puzzles whim as they are in real life.
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Do puppets have a lot of disposible income? Because I'll only do it if I'm making a lot of money. (Actually I have a smattering of half written stories I've given up on the past decade but am making a more serious push with a new one about what happens after the credits roll to the the guy in romantic comedies that gets left at the altar when the hero whisks away his childhood sweetheart from her own wedding. Also: in my books I try not to have run on sentences like that)
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That's due to some old, old legislation. And as it turns out, you should be thankful for it! During the Great Depression puppets' rights were became a major issue. While for centuries the abuse of puppets had gone largely ignored (see Punch + Judy vs The Country of Romania 1762). When times became tough there was a greater demand for puppets within Vaudeville. It was the ventriloquist "dummies" that first formed a National Puppets Union, which succeeded in establishing a fair pay rate, but failed in changing their job title to "Assistant to the Real Dummy".
The yearly evaluations are a product of modern micromanagement, which you wouldn't be able to enjoy if not for your predecessors hard work in social activism!
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Seth W
Wants Questions About
- stuff and also stuff.
