If you're looking for a love that will last, a bar certainly isn't the best place to look. Hell, these days it's probably not even the best place to look for random sex! The internet is where it's at.

Your best bet is to sit at home, especially if home happens to be your mother's basement, staring blankly at your computer screen and obsessively scanning dating sites for suitable candidates to carry your seed.

Then, of course, proposition said candidate for a simple evening rendezvous so you can make a final judgment on whether this person is qualified to be a vessel to carry your spawn.

I believe, then, it is customary to aggressively assert yourself onto the other in an act of procreation. I believe some refer to this as "rape" but that would just be arguing semantics.

I suppose a similar method could be used at the bar, and I imagine you can piece these suggestions together for use in such a situation.

Hope that helps!

Dr. N.