English.

Also all the other languages.

Generic.

Only if it was absolutely medically necessary.

It would be a sad, sad day. :'(

I wouldn't.

...What kind of a question is that?

Its like asking "pants, skirt, or breakfast?"

The former.

I didn't.

Early.

In a cinema? No idea, too many years ago.

Elsewhere? Tangled.

Wait, what?

Sneakers ARE shoes...

Nah.

Not remotely.

Kumquats.

Corpse-eating bacteria.

I dream that I am going to wake up before it happens all the time. I don't think that is what this question is referring to though

Do you mean just up and down while wearing it, up and down next to it also jumping up and down, or something else?

Neither, I use the clock on the wall.

Shower.

Yes, ever since a group of heights cornered me in a park and demanded all my money.

Milk.