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In honor of the 2,000th victory, I thought I should answer this one. Here's a quick list off the top of my head and in no particular order:
Jamal Mashburn
Tony Delk
John Wall
Derek Anderson
Patrick Patterson
No insult intended to Antoine Walker, Keith Bogans, Tayshaun Prince, Ron Mercer, Walter McCarty, etc. -
Off the top of my head, Skittles, Gobstoppers, probably any hard candy. Side salads. I have trouble thinking it would improve scrambled eggs. Peanuts, probably. Frosted Flakes and most cereals if I had to guess. Oatmeal feels like a coinflip. Watermelon. I'm sure I've missed some, but there's a list to get you started.
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Man, this is a tough one and I'm sure I've left out up to five people that should have been on this list instead. Off the top of my head, here's what I came up with.
5. John Milton (The Devil's Advocate) - The movie was only mediocre, really, but let's face it...when it comes to villains, it's hard to top the devil himself. John Milton is probably my favorite devil if only because Al Pacino makes evil seem so good.
4. Darth Vader (Star Wars) - I don't even like "Star Wars," but the man blows up planets when he doesn't get his way. Imagine if James Earl Jones was a major ass kicker...that's Darth Vader. Also, I'm ignoring any crappy back story from episodes 1-3.
3. Ivan Drago (Rocky IV) - Even before I understood any of the politics behind the cold war, Ivan Drago was a monster. Rocky has trouble with Apollo Creed...Drago punches him to death. Plus, that final boxing match was just epic.
2. John Doe (Seven) - One of my favorite movies (surely everyone knows the twist by now?) and one of the most wicked villains. As soon as Kevin Spacey shows up without finger tips, you know it's about to hit the fan. Plus, unlike most villains out there, he wins in the end.
1. Joel Schumacher (Batman Forever / Batman and Robin) - A Batsuit with nipples. Enough said. -
You can go with love by force if that's what floats your boat. But I have more faith in women. Women are attracted to power, right? And I'll be the most powerful man in the land. I expect plenty of widows flocking to my door when their men are no longer with us.
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Okay, based on my memory and Wikipedia for verification, Aladdin rules are (1) no killing, (2) no forced love, (3) no bringing back from the dead, and (4) no wishing for more wishes.
Wish #1: Immortality for all living beings.
- I have to cover my bases. Living forever isn't so great if everyone or thing I care about is gone in a relatively short period of time.
Wish #2: The ability to remove said immortality at my choosing.
- Face it, there are people I just don't want to deal with forever. This gets around the killing rule because I can wait out their death by old age...I have the time.
Wish #3: Teleportation.
- I figure I can get out of any tight jam if I can teleport. I can teleport in and out of bank vaults for cash...can teleport out of prison. And if the legal system hassles me, I can take their immortality away. I think that's the closest power to making me a deity. -
Leg, no question. If I lose an arm, it's 50/50 that it's my right arm. I don't want to have to learn to write, eat, and wipe all over again.
I lose a leg and worst case I'm stuck in a wheelchair, say it's a war injury, and get babied. Best case, I get one of those cheetah artificial legs and win a gold medal. -
I'm not a big popcorn gut to begin with. The salt always makes my lips tingle. But there is one thing I know, and that's that the movie theater stuff is one of the greatest things ever invented. I would lick the bottom of a movie popcorn bag clean. I would put that stuff on ice cream. Whatever, it's awesome.
Pork fat is better reserved for frying. -
I'd get one of those stretch Lincoln Navigators and a driver and we'd hit every state. I guess I'd have to fly to Hawaii, but that's fine. We'd hit all the nicest places.
The nicest places being the ones with the nicest bathrooms. I want to take a dump in every state. I think that'd be a sweet accomplishment. -
I peed in the egg drop soup.
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