Oh, you know darn well I can't answer this one. So I'll do my best to obfuscate and amuse and just plain duck and cover.

I lost some good men, great men, even. I ruined them, broke them, and left them for no damn reason at all. I didn't understand myself and had no means of regulating my emotions for so many years; I did a lot of damage. A couple of them left me, likely seeing me as selfish, possessive, fearful, bratty.

I plead lost, broken, empty, full of self-loathing. I didn't understand when I had something good, or didn't think I deserved it, but just know, all of you who think I might be talking about you, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. Forgive me. You were better than I thought I deserved.