Three. I'm currently learning a fourth and fifth.

The minibar. The entire fucking thing. Contents and all.

Fuck yo prices, hotel!

Jennifer Lopez

I was all about datAss.

the first irregular prime.

san juu nana
trente-sept
treinta y siete
zevenendertig
siebenunddreißig

...or if you're english, thirty-seven. 37. three tens and seven.

I think I explained my borderline obsession with the number in a previous response, if you're interested.

My mom. Seriously. It's mostly unintentional, though. Lemme give you a couple of classic mom lines to illustrate.

"I never realised will.i.am's name was actually William"

After finishing watching a DVD, she called me downstairs and looked at me, truly bewildered, and asked me "How do you rewind a DVD?"

Funniest part is that... she's probably one of the smartest people I know. I think I get my creativity and language skills from my mom.

Reminds me of something I saw on Bash a long time ago...

"The hardest part about using a Mac is telling your parents you're gay."

By most accounts, Ravenclaw... because I'm a weirdo smartarse.

The theory of evolution would logically suggest it was the egg, laid by the chicken's evolutionary ancestor... which contained the chicken.

Also, Inception was all a dream, The Matrix is in another Matrix, and Deckard is a replicant. No need to thank me.

Honestly, I'd give you a bit more assholery. Sometimes I think you're too nice to people.

Serious answer.

When I was really young, it was probably Home Alone or something. I remember I used to know that word for word. Then as I got older, Cool Runnings. I probably STILL know that (almost) word for word.

"...'The key elements to a successful sled team are a steady driver and three strong runners to push off down the ice' ... Ice?! ICE?"
"Well... It's kind of a winter sport y'know?"
"You mean winter as in ice?"
"Maybe..."
"Winter as in igloos and penguins and eskimos and ICE?!"
"Possibly."
"See ya."
"Where you going?"
"I'm gonna take a hot bath. I'm gettin' cold just thinkin' about all this ice!"

Classic.

What kind of rock? Igneous? Sedimentary? ... c'mon, work with me here.

Will Smith. Because I'm awesome and stuff.

Let's ignore the fact he is considerably older than I am... and taller... and stuff. Just... go with it.

I can see super speed being a pain in the ass.

Awesome for travelling long distances, but pretty much impossible to use in cities or built up areas (I'm thinking London)... Probably constant knee/foot pain too. Think about it. Not to mention everything else would start to seem (even more) slow and boring because I can move at the speed of sound or whatever. Probably also accidentally ruin my tv and windows with sonic booms when I'm in a rush to get to work (which will happen often, I'm black, so I'm always late).

Don't even get me started on sex. Let's just remind ourselves that force = mass * acceleration ...

In fact, thinking about it... super strength is probably even worse. "I'll have a Guinness" ... *shatters glass* "Oh for fuck's sake...That's the tenth one today!" ... Again, don't even get me started on sex.

Notice how comics and the movies never show you the downsides to this shit? Clever bastards. I kind of pity Superman now. Not only does he have to deal with this shit, but they also make him wear briefs. Over tights. The shame must be pretty intense... I mean like... when he isn't owning bad guys, of course.

not really. I think my radiant bosstitude scares most of it away

My left knee. The original injury was from a bad tackle while I was in mid-cross. As I turned, the defender clattered me studs up, hit me just below the knee-cap on my planted leg. The force of it hyperextended my left knee joint (inward toward my right leg and backwards) and damaged my cruciate ligament. Being a football mad teenager, I returned from injury too fast, pushed myself while running for a long pass, and I just felt my knee blow out. Turns out I damaged the ACL again, as well as the meniscus and patella. I still walk with a limp sometimes.

pay off my debts and buy a house probably. my initial instinct was to say "buy a football team" but there wouldntbe enough. not even for walsall town.

I've never received flowers. I don't really understand them anyway. They're nice to look at, but they're so fleeting. Its a bit of a token gesture, really.

On reflection, I guess I wouldn't really appreciate them the way they were intended if I ever did receive flowers. Not to say I don't understand the symbolism behind the gesture and what not. Its just... a bit confusing to me.

I guess I sort of already have my dream job. I coach youth football, which lets me combine two of the things I love most in the world: football and working with kids. The only thing I don't have is the pay packet to go with it. Ideally I'd want to be coaching at the highest level, and making a comfortable salary from it. At the moment, I'm coaching in the bottom tier of local youth football for no pay.

All in due time, though.

Simple answer: yes.

The complicated answer ... this belief changes as often as my perception of the world does, which is very. Mainly because reality, and therefore truth, is all based on how I perceive things anyway. I have consistently believed in some form of higher power though, which maintains a balance in the universe. Whether that power is sentient is a completely different debate. At the moment, though, I am okay with referring to this incomprehensible power as "God".

Truth is a pathless land.