Ask me anything
Recent Responses
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yeh lol
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suck ur mum i got bars
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If you have problems with being faithful, you probably shouldn't be in a relationship. Or have kids.
I'd be more worried about the other party -
That was pretty uncomfortable
gt 14 -
Sometimes before I go out I'll tell myself something, so I've already made that decision. Because if I'm put on the spot where I have to decide when drunk, it usually doesn't go well.
So before my first drink I say:
"I'm not going to kiss anybody tonight"
(fast 4wd)
I'm talking to this girl at a house party, but then I notice jars and jars of Nutella and get so distracted that I grab a spoon an-
"0ak you've been avoiding me all night, I can't help but think that something's happened between us"
She's said this before that night and obviously still thought it was a problem so I took her into the garden where it was just us two and had a friendly chat because that's the opposite of avoiding. But then she says-
"I find it funny how you've kissed my friends but not me"
Then she goes quiet for a while
"We're such good friends though. I mean, we're so close that I think we could mess around and it wouldn't even be weird or embarrassing."
She's swaying her hips
I'm thinking 'Shit, ur hot but I said I won't'
Then she closes her eyes and purses her lips and kinda just waits there while I'm thinking 'This is weird, they don't even do this in movies anymore'. Like she was just standing there with her eyes closed, I could drop my pants or pull faces and she wouldn't notice.
"0ak, kiss me"
Then she grabs my neck and pushes herself against me. We're at the far end of the garden in darkness, but the party's still visible through the trees. She starts moving her lips towards mine and I'm thinking 'How do I get out of this without making her feel awkward?', but then I remember the spoon I had in my pocket for the Nutella, so I whip it out as she's about to kiss me and put it inbetween us just before she reaches, like Gandalf whipping out his staff vs. Balrog and she ends up kissing the spoon instead. I'm thinking she's either gonna laugh about this, or feel really awkward, but neither of those happened. What happened was she licked the spoon from the base to the top, then started to deepthroat it. At this point I'm half in hysterics, half aroused, like she's getting dirty with this fucking spoon I'm holding that I took from this other girl's kitchen to eat her Nutella, which I still haven't eaten.
Anyway nothing came of that and I think I ended up going inside and eating the Nutella and I still have the spoon which I laugh at whenever I see and right now I feel kinda guilty that I took a girl's cutlery and I'm considering giving her like a few quid to cover the spoon expenses. -
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Bridge to Terabithia
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That one
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Fine, home alone in my underpants. wbu? wb x
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oppan gangnam style!
eeeeeeeh, sexy laaydeeeh -
1. I will listen to anybody's problems.
2. It doesn't take much persuading, if any, to make me do something (I don't mean being a performing monkey, more like taking risks), as a result I always have stories to tell.
3. When I hate my face, I can just grow a beard to cover it.
4. I can disguise my insecurity with overconfidence.
5. I'll see good things in any situation.
Haley Madison is berry confident
BKebab is always humble when I speak with him
Jelly has congruence
Porphyria is a self proclaimed pseudo-intellect, but I find her interesting and grounded and I like hearing what she has to say, even if her opinion differs from mine.
OC - The sun could burn out and you'd still keep the earth warm. -
berry easy question
but of course there are runners up
http://imgur.com/a/0ZTTO -
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It would be neither, because significant other doesn't also have to mean mother/father of your child, so you can stick around so long as the sex is good even if you aren't into kitty kicking or any other traits you don't agree with. I haven't actually heard the story so this isn't a comment on junemasterbread, just a half serious response to spock(?)
Although if you're in a business where you need to keep your integrity (like a professor of Pokemon) then you're gonna have to break up with them and if it's worth it, keep him/her as a mistress under the radar (if the sex is REALLY good). -
I've actually said this before when I was really close to dying.
'tell my mom i'm sorry' -
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i love moths and praying mantises
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how much did nolan pay you you fucking drone?
why don't you advertise my things?
and no i'm not
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